Card Carrying Lesbian … What’s in your wallet?

This is not a real blog. This is just me apologizing for not having a new blog up for you to read. But I can explain. I haven’t slept in about 48 hours, with the exception of a 2 hour nap. I don’t trust myself to write anything worth reading at this stage of delirious [...]

I recently made friends with a pretty cool woman. We even talked on the phone late into the night a few times. Gasp! What’s this? I actually spoke on the phone??? I know! That should tell you how much I like her. Since anyone who even remotely knows me, knows that I don’t do phones. [...]

A new friend of mine mentioned that she thought I was somewhat obsessed with my dogs. She may have come to this conclusion after reading #3 on my list of reasons not to date me. Her comment made me pause as I pondered where the line between love and obsession is when it comes to [...]

Even if you won’t admit it, I will. I’m prejudice. I’m prejudice against short girls and very very tall girls. But only if I plan on dating them.
As if lesbians don’t have enough to worry about when it comes to finding love, one thing that a lot of us look at is how tall she [...]

So as many of you read yesterday I wrote a public letter to “C” in an attempt to publicly shame her into behaving like a normal human being. Despite a few challenging comments she left, all seemed to be going pretty well.
Then I received a voice mail on my cell. I press and hold 1, [...]

The last time we visited my interesting past and by interesting, I mean slutty … I had just walked up on Farah riding my ex-boyfriend of 7 years like she was in the rodeo. Thank goodness Vic was right next to me and she whisked me off in her car to save me from any [...]

I’m sorry it’s had to come to this. But since I know you read this blog daily I knew you would see this. I won’t answer your calls or texts so please stop calling. Don’t email me or any of my friends anymore either.
I feel horrible to write a public letter, it feels like I’m [...]

When we last left off in the “Saga of the Straight Ex” … Farah had ambushed me into a three way with her yucky ex boy-friend. Which of course did not work. Meanwhile, Zoe had moved back to town and enrolled in the same school I was going to.
Again with the highlights:
I was totally screwed [...]

I was having this interesting conversation with a girl I just met. She’s about twenty-seven, pretty and identifies as an out lesbian. What struck me was that she’s a virgin. A gay virgin. She’s slept with men in the past, but she hasn’t had sex with a woman yet. She dates women, makes out with [...]

Honestly, I think bipolar chicks get a bad rap. Every time some girl goes all fatal attraction and makes bunny stew, she gets labeled, “That crazy bipolar bitch.” What the hell? I would like to take a moment here and say that there is a difference between psychotic sociopaths and bipolar disorder.
Here’s a quick checklist [...]

A friend of ours is having a BBQ this weekend for his birthday. So I thought I’d do a little social experiment and see if I could find a date on Craigslist! Last night I posted a simple little ad explaining the situation and a picture of me in my cowboy hat. Honestly I didn’t [...]

Just wanted to tell y’all about my friend LaLa’s blog, http://www.lalainla.blogspot.com/.
It chronicles the life of an east coast hottie making the move out to sunny California. Be sure to check it often to see what she’s up to next. The girl’s crazy and she’s got some of the hottest accessories in town!

After accidentally blurting out my alleged ties to a particular family, i.e. the Lipstick Mafia I received a number of inquiries desiring more details. While my lawyer advises that I say as little as possible and admit to nothing, I was able to dig up some information for inquiring minds.
Lip·stick Ma·fi·a aka Lesbian Mafia
-noun

a [...]

I have to say congratulations to one of my closest friends, Maggie and her new girlfriend Amber. You know it’s serious when they both change their myspace status to, “In a Relationship.”
But I give them credit because they managed to sidestep the typical lesbian behavior of instant relationship/roommate/u-haul/adopt a puppy fiasco. They took the [...]

1)
2)
3)
Oh man, who am I kidding? I’ve got bupkis.
I sat down tonight and tried to think of a list of reasons why someone would want to date me, to you know … ease the blow a bit. But I couldn’t come up with any! How sad is that? Of course I can think of some [...]

Maybe I should have posted this earlier, but better late than later.
(Slight disclaimer: For the right girl I might be willing to work a bit on 1,2,7 & 8 …. well, probably not 2. But the rest depends on you.)
1. I’m emotionally distant … I’ve been called cold on more than one [...]

A few days ago a woman who reads my blog on a regular basis sent me an email on myspace. Here’s what it said:
Hi, I read your blog everyday at work. I was curious about what you might look like so I sent you add request on here. Obviously. I don’t know what to say [...]

Many Buffy the Vampire fans were happy that Joss Whedon continued the Buffy story line in his Dark Horse comic book, Season 8. But controversy swirled around the recent installment titled, “Wolves at the Gate” because our girl Buffy gets it on with fellow slayer Satsu, a hot lesbian slayer who can convince even the [...]

When we last left off on the saga of the straight ex, also known as Zoe … she had moved back to Colorado to live a straight life with her ex, Mark. On my end of things, I was standing in the girls locker room with a naked actress named Farah standing in front of [...]

I went outside to get the mail today and surprise surprise, my cell phone was just sitting in my mailbox.  It doesn’t appear to be harmed from the hostage situation.

Warning: the following is not a real post, it’s a rant!
Many of you who know that I “lost” my cell phone a few weeks ago. I was certain it was going to show up sooner or later, but it never did. I almost gave in and bought a new one when I got an email [...]

What is it about a girl in a hat? I’ve noticed that if a girl on the street is sporting a cap, there’s a pretty good chance she’s gay. Now I realize that straight girls wear hats too, on bad hair days. But in general it seems that a gay girl is more likely to [...]

Admit it, you have one too. A close friend who you’ve known forever, you guys talk about everything, you go out and cruise for chicks together. You cry on her shoulder and she cries on yours and you totally want to know what it’s like to sleep with her. In spite of obvious sexual tension [...]

Myspace gets a bad rap with all the pedophiles and kidnappers on there. But hey, it’s no worse than LA. Personally, I love MySpace. I actually owe Tom a little thank you for the awesome group of ladies I now call my posse.
It all started one night when I was browsing MySpace for single [...]

Throughout the years there is a phrase that everyone who gets to know me well enough has uttered more than once, “You look like a girl but you think like a dude.”
When a girl starts talking and telling me about her day, an amazing thing happens. I go partially deaf and can only hear a [...]

I remember my first time in a lesbian bar. It was Girl Bar in West Hollywood and I went alone, not quite sure of what to expect. When I got there I was struck by the fact that what I was witnessing was nothing short of an anthropological discovery. The music pounded and the [...]

It was the night before graduation and I decided to visit my good friend, Carrie. She ran the campus photo lab and it was open late with several undergrads pulling all nighters trying to get their final projects in on time. I met Carrie four years earlier [...]

We all know one, a Super Lesbian. A girl who’s got it all together and keeps everyone else’s crap together too. There’s one in every group, the mother, the savior, the hero, the master chef and master builder all rolled into one. Our group has one too. I’ll call her Jeanine.
Jeanine is a Super [...]

What’s up with the mini-me versions of lesbian girlfriends? I know I’m not the only one who’s noticed that quite a few lesbian couples sort of look like long lost twins of one another. Not that there’s anything wrong with this. I’m not saying that there’s anything Freudian about wanting to make love to [...]

My amazingly cool group of friends are having a party this weekend. They’re calling it, “We’re too broke to make it to Dinah so we’re having an 80’s themed party!” OK. OK …. Maybe it’s not the catchiest name but you gotta admit, it gets the point across. My friends are nothing if not blunt.
Sounds [...]

I just spent 12 hours yesterday going around and around in circles trying to switch my WordPress theme on GoDaddy. I followed every tutorial, every step-by-step guide I could find. But to no avail. I’m stubborn and a do-it-my-self kind of broad so I kept trying until it was midnight and I was close to [...]