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Confessions of a Pillow Princess

pillow princess Pictures, Images and Photos

I was having one of those uncomfortable conversations late one night in bed with my girlfriend. It went something like this:

“It’s been two days.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’m just really tired.”

“That’s what you said last night and the night before.”

“I know, I’m sorry!”

“Stop saying sorry! I just want to know what’s wrong.”

Dead silence for a few minutes. Reruns of Ghosthunters playing in the background. Then for no good reason I can think of, out of the blue I follow up with, “You want to know what I miss about having sex with a man?”

Really? What the hell is wrong with me!?

“What?” was the only thing Remi could say but I could already see that I should have kept that part to myself.

Not to mention that I don’t actually miss having sex with men, but in my convoluted thinking I thought to myself, “This will be a good ice-breaker into why I haven’t been in the mood lately!” …. *dunce cap please* …. just point me to the nearest corner.

So what was my brilliant reason for missing sex with men?! This is what I said, “It’s the symbiotic nature of hetero sex. I mean, letting a man have sex with you is giving him pleasure in itself. That’s why I like butch women so much. They just really appreciate a woman’s body. They get so much pleasure out of pleasuring you. It’s just so …. so …. ”

To which she cut in and finished my sentence the way she thought it should be, “ ….. easy!?!? It’s so easy!!!!Is that what you miss???!!!?! Lesbian sex is just too much trouble for you? Is that what you’re saying?”

Ugh. OMG! Sooooooo not what I was getting at!!!!

Fuck me. Well, not literally at this point. I was not saying that I don’t want to work in bed. She knows for a fact that I love doing my part and I’ll do it for hours if that’s what it takes.

What I was trying to get across, unsuccessfully apparently, was that I miss the feeling that having sex with me, is enough for my partner. Instead I’m always thinking in the back of my head that when I’m done, it’s her turn. Maybe this is totally in my head but I can’t help but keep score in my head and the fact that she’s usually ahead of me in points makes me feel like a slacker in bed. Which I am not used to!

But then again, I’m used to dating butchier women, who rarely if ever let me even touch them. What can I say? I got spoiled.

I realize that posting this will make me seem like a selfish pillow princess in bed. But honestly I’m not! I’m just going through a funk this week. Haven’t you ever gone through a funk?
You’re lying if you say no!

In the end all I can say is that I’m human. I get tired. I’m not always up for the reciprocity that I feel is only fair in bed, so instead of letting her take care of me and then falling asleep. I just deny both of us any fun for the night. Which in turn leads to more problems then if I had just been a little selfish for the night and said “Thank you baby, you’re awesome!”

She pointed this fact out to me and let me know that it hurts her feelings more if I don’t let her touch me at all and that my reasoning …. sucks …. as usual.

Yet another way Remi proves to me that she’s a better girlfriend then I probably deserve.

67 Responses to “Confessions of a Pillow Princess”

  1. liz March 4, 2009 at 7:54 pm Permalink

    What I miss the most about having sex with men is…oh wait, never mind lol.

    I totally get what you mean about being in a funk. A good friend of mine and I once had that same conversation – always keeping count about having to return the favour. We couldn’t come up with a plausible explanation for it, either.

  2. Loki March 4, 2009 at 8:01 pm Permalink

    LMAO!!! Girl what is wrong with you!? How could you ever admit or even joke bout wanting a mad back in bed wit you? Girl, you must be out your god lovin mind. But I forgive you, cuz your sasha and your’re fine.

  3. NateDawg March 4, 2009 at 8:04 pm Permalink

    Hey “Sasha” you could always call me if this is ever really a problem for you. But I know better and Remi should too. You don’t want a man. If you did we’d still be together because you know there’s no better man for the job then me and if I can’t do it NO MAN can….guess it takes the right woman to do a mans job once in a while.

  4. TheOnlyButch March 4, 2009 at 8:06 pm Permalink

    I like that you wrote this because it shows appreciation for us butches. Too many lesbians in LA think that they want a femme and they’re prejudice against butches. But they’re missing out big time. Its nice to have a femme like yourself as an ally to the Butch Nation.

    If you ever need us, just send up the femme signal and we’ll swoop in and save ya. lol.

  5. Sasha March 4, 2009 at 8:10 pm Permalink

    I knew this would get me in trouble. For the record, I DON’T MISS HAVING SEX WITH MEN. AT ALL. I SWEAR!!! LOL

    But if I had said, “I miss having sex with butch women” that would have been WAY WORSE!!!

    Yes, I said “WAY WORSE” :)

  6. Cecilia Fernandez March 4, 2009 at 8:23 pm Permalink

    THAT was the most fucked up thing I have ever heard to have someone say to a butch….?!! I can see how that would piss her off…
    it’s kind of like a low blow, (man I wish I could get in to the army) sorry thinking of too many things at a time… but yea needless to say you probably didn’t have sex that night either huh…

  7. Cassie March 4, 2009 at 8:56 pm Permalink

    ahh. i can’t imagine that went over well at all. still i really do understand the reasoning behind what you were feeling. sometimes well i’m just a little lazy and want to just lay there and let the sex just be enough…without feeling the need to get too do too much work to give her an orgasm.

    maybe i should try sometime to just have sex. and if orgasms are had, be happy. if not, be happy i had sex? i really doubt my gf would be down, lol. still sometimes it’s nice to just enjoy the process without all the focus on who’s given more orgasms, and who is doing more work, and all that. sex feels good even if i don’t have an orgasm.

    /end rambling

  8. Dawg March 4, 2009 at 9:30 pm Permalink

    You have a way with words eh? Then somehow when your tongue attempts to form these words it completely fucks you ….

    Write Remi a ‘Sasha Manual’. When you need help simply tell her to turn to page suchnsuch for help.

  9. Sasha March 4, 2009 at 9:34 pm Permalink

    Ummm yea. No.

    It’s did not go over well.

    I seriously think I have a touch of turrets syndrome.

    It really would explain a lot.

  10. Sasha March 4, 2009 at 9:34 pm Permalink

    LOL …Dawg … a “Sasha Manual” …. I’ll get on that asap.

  11. OMG March 4, 2009 at 9:48 pm Permalink

    I can not believe you had the balls to write this! But I have to agree with you, there’s a lot of nights I don’t want to do anythingbut feel her down there, making me feel good. The last thing I want to think about (but always do) is that as soon as I cum, I have to make her cum and then it ruins it for me. I wish she did it just because touching me was enough for her for once in a while.

  12. Anonymous March 4, 2009 at 9:49 pm Permalink

    Sasha, I can’t stop laughing thinking about the scene of you and Remi in bed and you saying the random shit that comes flying out of your mouth for one reason or another. I think you just like to stir things up to make life more interesting. I don’t know. Whatever drives you, it’s funny as hell reading about the aftermath.

    Poor Remi.

  13. JustAButch March 4, 2009 at 9:50 pm Permalink

    Be glad Remi’s NOT BUTCH or she probably would have smacked you one for saying that.

  14. DB March 4, 2009 at 9:52 pm Permalink

    JustAButch, how do you know Remi didn’t slap her? She was a Marine after all.

  15. Newbie March 4, 2009 at 9:54 pm Permalink

    We know she didn’t slap her because

    a) Sasha would have blogged about that! For sure!

    b) Sasha would never be with someone who hit her. Have you read any of her other stuff?? She’s funny but she knows what she’s doing.

  16. Carrie March 4, 2009 at 9:57 pm Permalink

    Before you even finished that sentence you would have been feeling the back of my hand on your mouth, little girl.

    JustAButch is right, if you were in bed with a butch you would have had your sexy ass handed to you and you would have liked it. Girls like you need to be put in their place.

    or they go find someone who can.

  17. Real_Butch March 4, 2009 at 9:59 pm Permalink

    WTF is wrong with you people? A real butch doesn’t need to hit a woman to feel powerful. I would never lay a hand on a lady in anger, ever. No matter what she said or did. If Sasha was out of line, then I’m sure Remi talked to her about it. Like adults do. Anyone that would hit a woman doesn’t deserve the love of good woman.

    To Carrie and JustAButch – Suck my dick.

  18. D.C. March 4, 2009 at 10:08 pm Permalink

    LOLOLOL I think the comments section is the best part of your blog! Your readers are either nuts or really funny or smart and insightful. KUDOS to you for having such a wide range of readers and commentors. Seriously, some of them crack me up.

  19. Deb March 4, 2009 at 10:16 pm Permalink

    And this is why ‘butch’ is a bad word. Good grief. I think it’s safe to say Remi is butch. There are as many ways to be butch as there are ways to be femme….or a guy….or a woman. Are ALL straight women EXACTLY alike? Are ALL men EXACTLY alike? All this who’s-butcher-than-who crap gets old. It’s nothing more than a bunch of stiff legged ass sniffing bullshit. It seems most people (and lesbians are the BIGGEST offenders) think ‘butch’ encompasses all the WORST of neanderthal male behavior. Geez. With friends like the lesbian community, who the hell needs friends?

  20. Jul March 4, 2009 at 10:24 pm Permalink

    Wow Sasha…what an opener on that one!

    You have to give Remi some credit for hearing you out on that one…it’s definitely an attention grabber.

    The difference between you and me I suppose, is that when things get tight on time, I’m totally okay with someone pleasuring me and that being the end…and I would totally do the same if need be. I totally get the “scorecard” effect though…you want to be a good lover, do your part, and be a stellar lay…but life sometimes gets in the way.

    stupid life.

    The question becomes…do you want sex without reciprocity sometimes or no sex at all? I’d go with the first. Sure, you may have a little guilt…but it’s better than dragging around that blue vagina all day. (is that the equivalent of blue balls?)

  21. Becca March 4, 2009 at 10:31 pm Permalink

    Sasha, I am so glad you said that! I feel so guilty when my partner goes down on me and then says that is enough. I feel like I should be reciprocating, but she occasionally says that is all she wanted. I have never been with anyone who wanted to please me just for the sake of pleasing me, and I love every minute of it. I am sure Remi can be a big girl and let you know when it needs to be the other way around too. You rawk!

  22. Melody March 4, 2009 at 11:06 pm Permalink

    Wow, you can just not stay out of trouble. LOL ;) As for the commenters that talked of smacking a woman around. A true top doesn’t need to hit, doesn’t need to leave a mark, doesn’t need to ….. DO… anything… Just judging from the article itself. Anyone can see that Sasha does have respect for Remi..

    As for you Sasha-Lady… just chill and talk to her.. its all part of a relationship.. Good communication is part of a healthy relationship and sex life. Need I even mention that if you two are practicing S&Mers communication is essential.

  23. Eliza March 4, 2009 at 11:25 pm Permalink

    “It seems most people (and lesbians are the BIGGEST offenders) think ‘butch’ encompasses all the WORST of neanderthal male behavior.” —- well it usually does. I hate to say it but all the butch women I ever dated were more like immature 14 yr old boys who thought that objectifying women made them strong. I don’t know what it is about butch culture but it’s not for me.

  24. Hold on a minute March 4, 2009 at 11:28 pm Permalink

    Hold on a minute. I’m a butch woman and I am not immature nor am I ever abusive to women.

    I have an MBA and a JD, I am successful and secure in my position both within the gay community and life in general. I despise the fact that a lot of lesbians assume that because I’m butch, I’m stupid, crude or emotionally unaware. I am none of those things.

    I am however educated, cultured and know how to treat a woman.

    So any femmes reading this, leave a way to contact you on Sasha’s page. ;)

    BTW, Sasha – Never let someone lay a hand on you in anger. If they do, they don’t deserve you. Remi sounds like she’s got her head on straight.

  25. FemmeLA March 4, 2009 at 11:43 pm Permalink

    I’m a femme and I only date butches and I love them! I love being a pillow princess! That’s what she calls me, “Her pillow princess” and I love it and she takes a lot of pride in the fact that she’s such a good lover that she gets her satisfaction from knowing that no one else can do waht she does to me so. its the way i like it and she likes it to.

  26. Pillow Princess of guilt March 4, 2009 at 11:45 pm Permalink

    Sasha this is why I love your blog! You say what we would never say in a million years but it’s so true! I’m totally a pillow princess and I feel guilty about it. My gf is a top so i get away with it. But I know sometimes she wishes I would do more without her having to ask or hint about it. Some times I think I should date a butch woman so I don’t have to feel like this all the time but I really love my gf so I do what she wants.

  27. eleanor March 5, 2009 at 5:21 am Permalink

    I am in absolute agreement with you on this one. I don’t think I’ve ever really dated a butch woman (a man would be taking this one step to far!) but I can totally see the benefit in this department. Hm… maybe I am getting lazy in bed, but sometimes I simply can’t be bothered to reciprocate. It gets me into a lot of trouble in fact. That’s just one of the problems that arises when femme marries femme.

  28. I_saw_the_light_ March 5, 2009 at 12:48 pm Permalink

    Hi Sasha,
    I’ve been reading your blog for a year or so, and I love it. It has been a wonderful source of lesbian culture, as I am a late bloomer, and am in my first relationship with a woman. So I said all of that to say this…There is a level of reciprocality with us, however, I cum like a 14 year old school boy ie, I have no problems with the big O’s. My girlfriend has never had one, not even on her own…This has lead to in her words “You’ve gotten lazy.” Also she is frustrated and is leaning towards blaming it on me. Let me assure you I have done everything I can do. I’ve even gone to a sex therapist on my own. I feel it is up to her now. Anyway I guess I am just looking for some advice from all you lovely ladies. Maybe some of ya’ll have been in similar situations.

  29. Jolie March 5, 2009 at 12:58 pm Permalink

    Another one out of the park, Sasha dear. It’s a good thing I love your blog, otherwise I’d be so intimidated by your honesty and forthrightness that I’d never write another word!

    Good for you, for saying it (even if not the way you were trying to, meant it, whatever), because sometimes it just is what it is.

    And Remi of course gets credit, too, for hearing you out.

    I think the ‘reciprocity’ mentality comes from a couple of places: a) girls are not allowed to be selfish in our society, and b) women are not supposed to be wholly sexual creatures ever.

    It’s okay to be selfish sometimes. Just talk about it. Which you’re doing, so good job!

    Do they give good drugs for mild Tourette’s? Because I think I share the diagnosis.

  30. Irish March 5, 2009 at 3:44 pm Permalink

    Why does this not surprise me? You need to give Remi some for letting you get all of this out…damn, Think before you speak…especially, in bed Love!!!

  31. Jul March 5, 2009 at 4:00 pm Permalink

    To the lady looking for advice because her gf has never had an orgasm…My advice? She has to take responsibility for it. You said you saw a sex therapist, which is more than I would have done…she needs to talk to a doctor, get an eval to see what’s going on, and take care of herself. Her lack of orgasm is really not your responsibility unless you’re not doing your part…and it sounds like you have.

    Secondly, to the whole “Butch” conversation – I suppose I’m a sporty femme chick – but let me be blunt? Lesbians take things way too seriously. Everyone is going to have an opinion…hey, maybe you think I’m an egotistical prick? The difference is, I’m secure enough not to care.

    Be careful folks…you’re going to have a heart attack by 35.

  32. boRED March 5, 2009 at 11:58 pm Permalink

    Personally I think this post is fucking awesome! I mean really who in the world admits to being that fucked up to their girlfriend? LOL … Looking at your pics I think you only get away with all your BS due to your looks. I bet if you were ugly, she would have broken up with you a long time ago.

  33. WTF March 6, 2009 at 12:34 am Permalink

    WTF is up with these comments? First of all most of them have nothing to do with her actual blog. It’s just a bunch of butches having a pissing contest all over her page. She doesnt want you, she’s got her own butch. Remi is obviously enough for her or she wouldn’t be living with her. Duh. Get a life.

  34. Why oh Why March 6, 2009 at 12:36 am Permalink

    Why oh why is this all about butch and femme? Some butches still want to be pleasured by their femmes it just takes them longer to trust. But once they do, it’s fair play. Not to mention some are butch in the street but femme in the sheets. If Sasha likes butches because they love to please her leave her alone. I’m sure there are plenty who would love that job. I wouldn’t mind… if she was single of course. I don’t step on another butches toes.

  35. Danielle March 6, 2009 at 12:38 am Permalink

    Girls that look like you are always pillow princesses. Thats why you don’t pay, open doors, ask us out or do anything in bed except let us do what eer the hell we want to with you because we basically earned the right after spending so much on high maintenance chicks like yourself.

  36. SrfrGrl March 6, 2009 at 9:20 pm Permalink

    This is weird to read from you because when we were together you never let me touch you. It was totally one sided, but you weren’t the PP, it was me. :( Whats up with that?

  37. Nikki March 6, 2009 at 9:24 pm Permalink

    Sasha I moved to Manhattan beach got a new job working at a private school out there. I see Carrie still reads your blog. So if she reads this I want her to know I’m with a real butch now, one who treats me right. Any ladies out there meet a 5ft7 blonde butch in LB with glasses and she’s a personal trainer, watch out.

  38. Anna March 6, 2009 at 9:28 pm Permalink

    I’m surprised to read this, we dated a while ago back in 04 and you never let me touch you either. You were always the aggressor not that I minded but I wondered why you enver let me do anything. I figured it was either a power trip or trust issues. . Wow, I guess people really can change.

  39. Deb March 7, 2009 at 12:35 am Permalink

    Butch bashing is still butch bashing. I don’t care if many butches are egomaniacs and thugs. It doesn’t mean all of us are.

    I am educated, emotionally available, articulate, creative, artistic and have been able to sustain long term, mutually loving and supportive relationships. I resent having to refrain from using the term ‘butch’ because of all the internalized HOMOPHOBIA that runs rampant in the gay community. This is the same homophobia that HATES nelly boys. Butch women and nelly boys are the FLAMERS of the gay world. We are UNABASHEDLY and OBVIOUSLY QUEER. We will OUT you to the rest of the world because we look like EXACTLY who we are.

    Just because SOME femmes are self-indulgent, bratty, high maintenance, spoiled and narcissistic pillow ‘princesses’ does not mean that all are. And it wasn’t too many years ago that femmes were DISDAINED within the lezzzzzzbian community because they looked suspiciously ‘straight’. But now that we have the so-called fabulous L Word, and all those ‘lipstick’ lezzies, the femmes have received a ‘get out of hetero-land free’ card.

    Disclaimer: I am happily partnered and in NO WAY seeking to set my self apart hoping for crumbs and handouts from Sasha’s table, as someone seems to think any butch with a real beef is up to. She is also partnered to a B U T C H. I realize that within the city limits of LaLa Land, it is illegal to be butch and lipstick, stilettos and silicone are issued at all check points.

  40. Sasha March 7, 2009 at 2:13 am Permalink

    Dear Readers and ALL “BUTCHES” I want it very clear that I am never EVER butch bashing. Unlike a lot of los angeles lipstick lesbians, I actually appreciate butch women for who they are and the bravery they have to walk in this world unashamed of who they are, never trying to “fit” in to the main stream world’s categories of how “they” think we should be.

    Nor do I EVER think that anyone would EVER want my “crumbs and handouts ” …. I am not as vain as to think that anyone would want that. I am lucky enough to have a wonderful gf that thinks I’m prettier than I actually am.

    I am an ally and fan to the butch community and it baffles me that there is such division within the lesbian community.

    So thank you Deb for leaving that comment and to several other people who left well thought out and supportive comments.

    This is not a forum for hate speech, or bashing of any kind but I would like it to be a place where people can voice their opinions and have and open and mature dialogue about it.

  41. chris March 19, 2009 at 9:35 am Permalink

    Enjoyed this blog. New to this whole type of relationship and looking for any insight I can find! Hope you two have worked it out- overall, it sounds like you have a very loving accepting relationship. Me, I have a beautiful woman at home I can only hope to satisfy one day. Again, enjoyed this!

  42. lesbo March 20, 2009 at 12:33 pm Permalink

    haha!
    love this!

    i sometimes feel the same way. you’re not alone.
    but then sometimes gf and i both think it’s plenty ok for just one of us to ‘receive’ that night. the other one always gets their fair share at a later date :)

  43. Amber Jade (face book) July 18, 2009 at 10:48 am Permalink

    Its nothing wrong with being a “pillow princess” whether your with a lipstick lesbian, bisexual female or a butch woman, as long as its clear from the very beginning that you are a pillow princess.

    If your not clear of your turn on’s, what you like or what your looking for there will always be an issue on both sides.

    I am a proud sexy little pillow princess who plays no games about my sexual prefference, no confusion.

  44. Kim August 14, 2009 at 10:53 pm Permalink

    Hey Sasha, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a pillow princess. If we didn’t want to do it, we wouldn’t do it. Period. Accept the fact that beautiful women are always taken care of in and out of the bedroom.

  45. eliana December 9, 2009 at 5:25 am Permalink

    wow wow wow wow wow.
    first of all its understandable that in attempts to acquire sympathy in the situation you said something you didnt necessarily mean to the full extent, regardless of what it was that was said. totally get it.

    second. i am not a butch, but i am a feminine lesbian who is primarily attracted to butch women. while there are certain dynamics that generally come with butch/femme relationships, you can never ever generalize. because while someone may categorize themselves (or be categorized) as something, they still have a personality that is 100% completely THEIR OWN.

    and i agree. the butch allowing the femme to be the “pleaser”, as well can definitely depend on the trust level. that would be a good example of my current relationship. it took a few months to get to the point where she allowed the pleasing to be equal. and my woman is a big big butch. and i absolutely love it. :]

  46. Sarah January 21, 2010 at 2:23 pm Permalink

    Hmm… (good blog I stumbled upon here, btw! :)

    I don’t really see where the problem is. I’ve identified as bi all my life (I mean like since I was 15) and am in my first serious relationship with a woman, finally, at 38, and wonder what on EARTH I was missing all these years. No turning back for me!! (and I honestly really enjoyed sex with men).

    I don’t see why lesbian sex has to be at all about taking turns. It rarely is for me, usually we’re getting off together in some way. There are so many ways to get creative and inventive about it. We don’t have a butch/femme relationship, we both identify as shapeshifters/genderqueer and like trading roles and are totally comfortable with genderplay too.

    If you want things to be more reciprocal just use your hands or her body or a toy, and get off at the same time. What’s the big deal?

  47. celine March 8, 2010 at 6:38 pm Permalink

    Hi I am Celine, geoffcm is the name of my baby brother who died age 2 weeks in case you think I was a pervert guy. I agree with a lot of posts here, I live in Ireland , more girls are coming out here now but it still isnt easy. Like its all about mood isnt it? sometimes you really really want it and sometimes you cant face it. I was really lucky in boarding school but now you have to navigate. Some girls here just lead you on then expose you. Had that and dont ever want it again. I like what i saw here and will visit again. Thanks for listening, if anybody did

  48. H March 16, 2010 at 3:57 pm Permalink

    :( Oh man! You are not a pillow princess… Two days? That’s nothing. I have been with someone that the only time we had sex is if I was doing things to her, it happened about once a month and she never reciprocated… Now I am in a relationship with a butchie… It’s really nice because pleasing me is more fun for her than me pleasing her… BUT! She has been telling me she is tired a lot and I can’t figure out what is going on… It use to be every day, then every other day, then every three days, then once a week, and now once every two weeks… She just says she’s tired… I don’t know what I am doing wrong and she gets mad when I try to talk to her about it. I am up for anything and more than willing to please her… I just don’t want to start falling onto old hang ups that my partner doesn’t find me attractive….

  49. she April 4, 2010 at 5:51 am Permalink

    well.. I’m sure you will hate me for this.. but.. I’m totally straight.. the thought of one of my girlfriends going down on me makes me even nauseous.. but I love sex.. and the give and take.. the one thing that we have in common is that if you do it all the time it gets old.. so my advice that is across the board.. don’t make it chore that you owe each other.. the more u deny, the better it will be when you have it.. and then neither of you will be tired.. you will be ignighted.. :)

    Best regards..
    Your straight gerlfriend!

  50. Raye April 11, 2010 at 6:32 am Permalink

    ahh… the blog that sucked me into your world via google. I had a little more time to read through all the comments on this one and I just wanted to say that I am a butch and I may tend to brag about my mechanical skills and sexual prowess (actually my femme gf does the bragging about that) but I NEVER hit women in anger and I have rarely even defended myself when a femme was hitting ME. I think those women who say that about butch women have not found women at all but little bois who have something to prove. I find it rather offensive that they accuse ALL butches of abuse especially since I still have the pictures of the bloody, black, purple, and blue marks on my body stored away in a file I don’t look at but keep for insurance purposes. I also know several other butchies who don’t hit either… in fact NONE of the butchies I know hit women.

  51. you'reapillowp July 29, 2010 at 2:21 am Permalink

    sorry to break it to you, but that sucks. i’ve been in your girlfriend’s shoes. date men, honey, you sound like a lazy lez.

  52. Raye July 29, 2010 at 3:49 am Permalink

    Hey dumbass I hate to break it to you but that is YOUR opinion. Some of us butchies LIKE pillow princesses. Why the fuck do lesbians think they have the right to judge other lesbians as to how lesbian they are?? Who made YOU the Queen of Lesbos?? Wow I rarely say this to another woman but shut the fuck up. Seriously.

  53. Rexie July 29, 2010 at 10:45 pm Permalink

    Go Raye!

  54. Arthur Mboue September 7, 2010 at 1:16 pm Permalink

    If a woman eats you. You must eat her.T that what the G people do. OR. Come back to us, This time, men will expect more of you
    Arthur Mboue

  55. Sapph September 20, 2010 at 5:19 am Permalink

    I have my own lazy and selfish lesbian at home. that she’s a lesbian and I am too is not the problem of course, its different sexdrives and me wondering what the hell it is with lesbians these days. Are they all that lazy and selfish. This is girlfriend nr 4 in 12 years that does not take any initiative, keeps me hanging when the phone rings or is tired every bloody day! I wish I was straght Maybe I’d get more than a fuck a year

  56. Jazmenha December 12, 2010 at 2:01 am Permalink

    I know this is a old post but the blog title looked interesting so I decided to read it…..wow interesting/intense comments. hummm
    Sasha admire your honesty, openness and bravery to write what you were really thinking/going through at the time.

  57. Jazmenha December 12, 2010 at 2:13 am Permalink

    It was beyond shocking/disappointing to read all the comments about how you “should have been hit”- “that a butch would have hit you for saying that” and the comments about “being a lazy lesbian”. WTF (a thousand times WTF!!!!!!!) was is up with all that being written to you????? Again, I know this was a much older post, but the title caught my eye and some of the comments made me sick.

  58. Elegy December 12, 2010 at 2:50 pm Permalink

    “Power bottom” is still my favorite term. >.>

  59. Jazmenha December 12, 2010 at 3:15 pm Permalink

    @ Elegy- Hi girl! Weren’t some of these comments horrible! OMG I can not believe how some of the commenters were thinking and addressing Sasha here it was horribly disrespectful.

  60. Elegy December 12, 2010 at 3:23 pm Permalink

    Yeah, I’ve read them about 3 times now, and I’m going through on my fourth time. I try to not let them get to me, and two years does take the sting out of it for me. I try and focus on all the *real* people- butches, femmes, women who told those abusive asses where they could stick their heads.

  61. Jazmenha December 12, 2010 at 3:31 pm Permalink

    @ Elegy- Yeah me too and of course once again Raye was protecting the reputations of REAL butches who are good people and who are of upstanding character such as hers. Elegy what was up with the comments from Carrie and Dwag lol WTF was their problems??? Yeah this was a VERY old post so it’s all in the past. :)
    @ Femmelover- Hi! Thanks for the holiday wishes-sorry took so long to reply. Hope all is well. I know you would have been right there with Raye in representing/defending all the butches of good character that are in this crazy world. Happy Holidays.

  62. Jazmenha December 12, 2010 at 3:35 pm Permalink

    @ Elegy my “lol” after their names was NOT laughing funny it was representing my head spinning/are you kidding me/WTF are people thinking…

  63. Akabrutuslol May 21, 2011 at 5:30 am Permalink

    I just came upon this blog this morning … funny and interesting. Initially, I was looking for a definition of “aggressor” female. I like being aggressive in bed and OF COURSE I want to please my partner in ALL aspects of the relationship. But I also like the idea of my girl wanting to turn me on and wanting to please me as well. I thought that’s what “relationships” were supposed to be about. And trust I’m not living in a fairy tale, I’ve really experienced this. That being said, I have to say Sarah hit the mark for me. Reciprocity babygirlz should be where you want to be. Don”t really get all this one sidedness. You can order toyz online to pls yoruself and toss it in the drawer when you are done… why bother bringing someoneelse into it.

  64. Charisse July 22, 2011 at 12:44 pm Permalink

    DUDE, are you ME?!?! I have had those same thoughts. My wife is a *BIT* butchier than me. I am kind of a pretty pretty princess. And I occasionally think that same exact thing. Rather than hurt her feelings by not returning the “favor” isn’t it just better for nothing to happen at all. And, like you, I was told that that logic was just dumb and I was absolutely wrong.

  65. nearstar July 30, 2011 at 6:43 am Permalink

    My god, Sapph, don’t you think you’re worth more than that? Are you really the desperate loser you sound like?

  66. stuccobill October 20, 2011 at 4:22 am Permalink

    As if you haven’t already been kicked around enough, here comes a man to let you know that it is not enough, for me, for you just to let me have sex with you. the plumbing refuses to work if i do not have some kind of connection with you. every woman with whom i have had sex has left with a piece of my heart, some larger than others.

  67. Jazmenha January 15, 2012 at 11:47 pm Permalink

    These comments remind me of how heartless and meanspirited people can be. OMG slapping a women is NEVER fucking ok! Never! I do not care if you are a woman hitting another woman or a man hitting a woman that is fucking disrespectful. Sex is a gift. It is a treasure. It is not someones to take, to expect, to require or get slapped.
    Disrespecting butch women, or anyone for that matter, is not acceptable.
    Disrespecting Sasha is absolutely unacceptable.
    I know this is a very old post, but I am just so fucking done with how poorly people treat eachother and am very discouraged at what I see/read/know/learn about the world around me lately! It’s just not right and frankly it’s just too much for me… When will people return to kindness?????

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