Where has Sasha been? Well I’ll tell you and I’ll stop speaking in the annoying third person.
Over the last two weeks I have been embroiled in the most complicated, lesbian cluster fuck ever imaginable. Not only is it ALL totally blog worthy, it also happens to be so personal and painful that I actually can not really tell you all the details.
But I can give you an idea.
The said cluster fuck involved my former best friend Zoe, Becky, and of course me. It seemed that the minute Remi’s plane took off, my world would explode into a childish game of “She said, she said” drama of epic proportions.
I really can’t get into the details except to say that after all was said and done, Becky and I remained friends, all though for a day or so we both thought we hated each other and thought that Zoe was the innocent doe she so masterfully presented to the world.
But after all the sh*t hit the fan and we wiped the metaphorical blood from our brow we realized that Zoe had been anything but the innocent damsel in distress we both thought she was. If our emotional wounds, upsets and turbulence that we suffered over all of this lesbian drama had a physical equivalent, when all the dust had settled you would have seen three women, bruised and bloodied. Maybe one or two of them would have had tear stained faces that betrayed the depth of their feelings over what had occurred, even if in the aftermath all you would hear them say was, “Fuck her. I don’t care.” When in reality you knew they did.
A few days have passed and we’ve all retreated to our own corners to lick our wounds and regroup. But one thing is clear. When we come back out, Becky and I will be the only two still speaking to one another. I’m sad to say that even though our friendship survived this debacle, I do feel that it was injured in some way. Hopefully over time, it will heal completely and we’ll be better friends then we were before.
I also learned that there’s nothing more dangerous to a lesbian then falling for a straight girl, or a even worse, a girl in denial over her sexual identity. We can’t change others and we can’t force anyone out of the closet. All we can do is be true to ourselves and respect ourselves enough to realize that our time is too valuable to waste on people who see us as an experiment or a walk on the wild side. We deserve to be surrounded by people who are as true to themselves as we are to ourselves. That way we don’t have to waste any time and we can get down to what’s really important: love and friends.
I’m sure a few of you will read this and shake your heads, thinking that I’m immature for getting caught up in such petty drama. But the truth is, it wasn’t petty. It was about trust, friendship, loyalty and love. If those issues are too insignificant for you to waste your time on, then that’s your business. But the way I see it, it was time well spent to find out who my real friends really are.
“ll we can do is be true to ourselves and respect ourselves enough to realize that our time is too valuable to waste on people who see us as an experiment or a walk on the wild side.”
I couldn’t agree more. Kudos.
What a disaster.
OK you can’t really leave us hanging like that. What the hell happened???
Hey doll face, what’s the real story? Isn’t Zoe an ex and wasn’t Becky dating Zoe? So tell us the details, that’s bound to be super juicy.
Sometimes you have to get in the fire to find the diamonds, Sasha. In the end, it worked out like it was supposed to and sometimes you need to go through things – regardless of how major and dramatic – to find out who your real friends are. I’m a big believer in everything happening for a reason. Wishing you all the best.
What th hell happened???? Sounds like sex was involved. Who slept with who and when and why and who lied about it?? All that drama doesn’t happen between lesbians without some serious bed hopping happening betwen you guys. Spill it.