Comments on: In Defense of My Gayness … Again http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again The raw, unedited adventures of a femme lesbian and her friends. Fri, 10 Feb 2012 07:45:59 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Jazmenha http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-324283 Jazmenha Thu, 24 Nov 2011 19:10:13 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-324283 Saun- You wrote "and no matter what I do, I'm not able to convince my guy to break up with me." Be careful this turn into a stalker- seriously and that is a firery hell you do NOT want (trust me). Do not settle. If you do not want to be with him or any man don't. If you do, then do. The choice is YOURS alone. Dont just stay w him because he is your "first" stay w him because you can't imagine being w/out him. I have concluded and embraced that I have NO interest in being with a him ever again and so I am waiting for her- until I meet her I'm happy being the best me I can be so I can bring a stronger/healthy me to my relationship with her. Good luck. Do not settle! Saun- You wrote “and no matter what I do, I’m not able to convince my guy to break up with me.” Be careful this turn into a stalker- seriously and that is a firery hell you do NOT want (trust me). Do not settle. If you do not want to be with him or any man don’t. If you do, then do. The choice is YOURS alone. Dont just stay w him because he is your “first” stay w him because you can’t imagine being w/out him. I have concluded and embraced that I have NO interest in being with a him ever again and so I am waiting for her- until I meet her I’m happy being the best me I can be so I can bring a stronger/healthy me to my relationship with her. Good luck. Do not settle!

]]> By: Jazmenha http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-324223 Jazmenha Thu, 24 Nov 2011 18:03:18 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-324223 Excellent post. Excellent post.

]]> By: saun http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-323855 saun Thu, 24 Nov 2011 12:18:34 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-323855 "But later I realized that being able to have sex with a man and enjoy it has nothing to do with who you want to spend your life with. " ...exact same thing is happening to me right now and no matter what i do, i'm not able to convince my guy to break up with me. And sometimes I feel may be i'm wrong coz i do enjoy sex with him , i like his company and all BUT when it comes to long term commitment can't imagine myself with him or any other guy :( (side note: he is the only man i have ever been with ) “But later I realized that being able to have sex with a man and enjoy it has nothing to do with who you want to spend your life with. ” …exact same thing is happening to me right now and no matter what i do, i’m not able to convince my guy to break up with me. And sometimes I feel may be i’m wrong coz i do enjoy sex with him , i like his company and all BUT when it comes to long term commitment can’t imagine myself with him or any other guy :(
(side note: he is the only man i have ever been with )

]]> By: Janina http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-2315 Janina Sat, 31 May 2008 03:59:14 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-2315 I deal with this same thing in the gay community. I don't understand why any of us have to "prove" anything. Why can't we all just be happy knowing that there are times in our lives where we have connected with another human being in a wonderful way, regardless of the person's gender. Must there always be some sort of label attached? Just be yourself. I deal with this same thing in the gay community. I don’t understand why any of us have to “prove” anything. Why can’t we all just be happy knowing that there are times in our lives where we have connected with another human being in a wonderful way, regardless of the person’s gender. Must there always be some sort of label attached? Just be yourself.

]]> By: No really, I’m gay. « A Lesbian and a Scholar http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-2293 No really, I’m gay. « A Lesbian and a Scholar Sat, 31 May 2008 02:16:26 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-2293 [...] really, I’m gay. My new favourite dykeblogger, Card Carrying Lesbian, posted this the other day about people constantly challenging her gayness, and it really resonated with me. [...] [...] really, I’m gay. My new favourite dykeblogger, Card Carrying Lesbian, posted this the other day about people constantly challenging her gayness, and it really resonated with me. [...]

]]> By: Alejandra http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-1953 Alejandra Thu, 29 May 2008 08:53:48 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-1953 I sort of divorced myself from my crazy family at 17 and ran away to the military. They naturally took me in and and promptly sent me off to war (but that's another story, lol!). I realise it was a strange place to begin all things considered, but anyway....as I was still your basic fucked up teenager, I hadn't decided which I prefered. Men or Women? I spent 5 years in green. For the first 3 I alternated between male and female partners (Not saying there were lots of either here) For the last 2...I found myself with one female. My very first ever relationship with a woman. After that it was plain sailing on my part. I never looked back...it was the all girl team for me! I can't speak for everyone, but like Miss Sasha...sex with men didn't always suck (no pun intended, lol) but sex with women was on a whole other level...FAR FAR above that of anything with any guy. It was a natural transition for me. I have no regrets. I'm a lesbian 100,000,000% and I'm happy. Completely safe in the knowledge that as I've been there...men are not for me! Pretty uncomplicated stuff really, lol. I sort of divorced myself from my crazy family at 17 and ran away to the military. They naturally took me in and and promptly sent me off to war (but that’s another story, lol!). I realise it was a strange place to begin all things considered, but anyway….as I was still your basic fucked up teenager, I hadn’t decided which I prefered. Men or Women?

I spent 5 years in green. For the first 3 I alternated between male and female partners (Not saying there were lots of either here) For the last 2…I found myself with one female. My very first ever relationship with a woman. After that it was plain sailing on my part. I never looked back…it was the all girl team for me!

I can’t speak for everyone, but like Miss Sasha…sex with men didn’t always suck (no pun intended, lol) but sex with women was on a whole other level…FAR FAR above that of anything with any guy. It was a natural transition for me. I have no regrets. I’m a lesbian 100,000,000% and I’m happy. Completely safe in the knowledge that as I’ve been there…men are not for me! Pretty uncomplicated stuff really, lol.

]]> By: Grace Chu http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-1943 Grace Chu Thu, 29 May 2008 05:18:35 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-1943 Sing it, sista. I've been out about as long as you have. And I also came out as "bi" as a transitional term. It's simply difficult to jump from identifying as straight (by default, in my case) to OMG GAYGAYGAY! Identifying as "bi" simply made the transition easier. "I’m not going to chop all my hair off and get a bunch of tattoos or any other lame stereotype just to make it easier to point me out in a lesbian line-up." And I couldn't agree more. I saw a thread on afterellen cross-posted on queersunited.blogspot.com today about the term "straight-acting," a term I find to be sort of silly. How can two feminine-looking girls who are walking down the street holding hands be "straight acting"? That's gayer than gay in my opinion. It's annoying that queers termed the phrase "straight acting" to denote lesbians that are femme and gay guys who are masculine. I feel that queers should know the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity. It's what what you wear - it's who you kiss. Sing it, sista. I’ve been out about as long as you have. And I also came out as “bi” as a transitional term. It’s simply difficult to jump from identifying as straight (by default, in my case) to OMG GAYGAYGAY! Identifying as “bi” simply made the transition easier.

“I’m not going to chop all my hair off and get a bunch of tattoos or any other lame stereotype just to make it easier to point me out in a lesbian line-up.”

And I couldn’t agree more. I saw a thread on afterellen cross-posted on queersunited.blogspot.com today about the term “straight-acting,” a term I find to be sort of silly. How can two feminine-looking girls who are walking down the street holding hands be “straight acting”? That’s gayer than gay in my opinion. It’s annoying that queers termed the phrase “straight acting” to denote lesbians that are femme and gay guys who are masculine. I feel that queers should know the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity.

It’s what what you wear – it’s who you kiss.

]]> By: Cecilia http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-1892 Cecilia Wed, 28 May 2008 21:35:50 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-1892 p.s. OMG!!! I SOOOO ONLY KISS GIRLS TO!!!! OMG... we have so much in common... lol p.s. OMG!!! I SOOOO ONLY KISS GIRLS TO!!!! OMG… we have so much in common… lol

]]> By: Cecilia http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/http:/cardcarryinglesbian.com/featured/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again#comment-1891 Cecilia Wed, 28 May 2008 21:32:43 +0000 http://www.cardcarryinglesbian.com/2008/05/28/in-defense-of-my-gayness-again/#comment-1891 dude.... you sound like "A GAY" to me... and yea ALL lesbians know that MOST gay PEOPLE tried to be str8 first.. all gay people know that... witch brings the question?? is it a breeder that has the NERVE to say your not gay enough??? dont heed breeders (mostly the guys) if its a guy, its just cuz hes trying to have sex with you, and ironicly if its a girl, if you think about it............... its cuz shes trying to have sex with you too, in there own ignorant minds. for some reason str8 chicks want to have sex with girls but dont want to be gay? so dont know what to tell you about that.... but yea... you want me to go give this person dirty looks?? cuz ill be all like ............. GRRRRRR..... if you want :) dude…. you sound like “A GAY” to me… and yea ALL lesbians know that MOST gay PEOPLE tried to be str8 first.. all gay people know that… witch brings the question?? is it a breeder that has the NERVE to say your not gay enough??? dont heed breeders (mostly the guys) if its a guy, its just cuz hes trying to have sex with you, and ironicly if its a girl, if you think about it…………… its cuz shes trying to have sex with you too, in there own ignorant minds. for some reason str8 chicks want to have sex with girls but dont want to be gay? so dont know what to tell you about that….

but yea… you want me to go give this person dirty looks??
cuz ill be all like …………. GRRRRRR…..

if you want :)

]]>