So as you know it was my birthday last Friday. Sorry that it took me so long to document the weekend for your reading pleasure but let’s just say that it was so damn good, it’s taken me this long to recover.
Alright then … let’s get down to the business of catching you up. This is going to take a few minutes.
First of all I need to backtrack to a few nights before my birthday. Remi and I were hanging at the Dolphin discussing who was going to be coming out with us to Girl Bar when she casually mentioned, “Oh yea, I invited Chatsworth too.”
Wait. What did she just say? My ears must be bleeding because I know I did not just hear my gf say that she invited the very last girl she banged prior to me, to my effin’ birthday!!!
I took a another drink of my Jager, swallowed hard, glared at her and said, “Excuse me?”
Remi must have seen the steam rising out of me, or maybe the fire from my eyes burned her a little because she instantly tried to make it better. However, witness the break neck speed at which she makes things a thousand times worse …. she follows up by saying, “No no no, it’s not like that. You see it’s her birthday on the 12th so I thought …”
I had to break in at this point and for some reason my voice was surprisingly calmer than it sounded in my head but I interrupted her to verbally explicate the situation as I saw it, “Let me get this straight. Not only did you just tell me that you invited the most recent girl that you used to fuck before me, to MY birthday. But you did it because it’s also HER birthday a few days later? So I’m supposed to share MY birthday with HER? So you can kill two birds with one stone? …. That’s nice of you. Thank you. Then I should have invited Mr. like I wanted to.”
Yep, you read that right. I threw Mr. in her face. To which she jumped on that, “Oh yea, please do. I would love to see her. I have a few things to say to her.”
I just sat there a few moments. Absolutely livid. I really didn’t know what to say. So Remi kept trying to back peddle, “Look, I knew she couldn’t come anyway, that’s why I invited her. She’s not even coming!”
Uh …
Let’s put this all in order:
- She invited an ex-lover of hers to my birthday.
- Knowing that she couldn’t make it.
- But why?
- To make that girl feel like she still meant something to her?
- But if she knew she couldn’t make it and wouldn’t be there, then why, OH WHY tell me about it???!!!
- To piss me off?
- To make me jealous?
- To throw her in my face?
- But again I ask why?
I have no idea. But it pissed me off to no end. Lucky for her I was too tired and drunk that night to really make a big deal out of it and I’m one that likes to stew about things a little. Which I did and which I chewed her out about the next night to my satisfaction.
But have no fear, a few nights later Remi would totally and completely redeem herself by giving me the best birthday I have ever had!!!
Check back to tomorrow to see if I kept my promise about getting lucky at Girl Bar.
Wow and I thought I was bad at sticking my foot in my mouth. Remi must have felt like she was in quick sand.
Didn’t you say she was a lot younger then you? Maybe she feels insecure about being with you sometimes so she has to prove to you that she’s desired by other women. Howver she should have waited till after you birthday.
LMFAO this shit’s funny as hell. Does Remi know you tell every detail of your life together online? I think it’s hot and I love to read about you guys all the time. It makes my life a little less boring, living through u 2. But if i were Remi I might feel weird about it.
Hi Luvit, thanks for your comment, just wanted to tell you that I have the most supportive gf ever and I have her blessing when it comes to writing about our sex life for the whole world to see. I think the fact that I don’t use her real name or anyone’s real name for that matter, really goes a long way!
The funniest thing I’ve read in a long time < “However, witness the break neck speed at which she makes things a thousand times worse” _ that had me rolling on the floor laughing my ass off!!! My girlfriend is constantly putting her foot in her mouth but never thaat bad!!! She knows better.
Sash, wtf? You know I would never have done that shit to you.
This is totally amusing. You asked, “Why?” Why she invited an ex-lover of hers to YOUR birthday? Maybe she isn’t nearly as confident and cocky as you assume. Maybe she made plans initially to go there with Chatsworth? Maybe she asked both of you to make sure she would make it with at least one of you, if not both of you? The more the merrier? Just my twisted dyke drama way of thinking…. But I think you had EVERY right to be pissed! Not sure I’d easily let it drop either. Thanks for sharing…
LMAO! You probably did something to deserve it.