Written by Guest Butch, K
Who are we? The writers of this blog, Sasha, Raye, LB_Boi, and myself included are gay advocates. As gay advocates, we have a responsibility to ourselves and our community to educate anyone who is unaware of us.
That being said, remember our allies. Remember who we need as allies. 75% of the people in politics, the people we need behind us, are men. But they’re also politicians. And fathers. And sons. And brothers.
Hate is hate. Whether you’re a man basher or a gay basher. What happened to human rights? Or civil rights or whatever. When it comes down to it. We’re all human. There are women out there who are just as offended by gays as men. Mothers who kick their sons and daughters out of their homes for being who they are. Why call men out?
Change doesn’t come easy. Gays have been fighting for forty years to get the same tax rights as everyone else. The same marital recognition. It took african americans hundreds. We vote. We own property. Their are laws against hate crimes that ARE inclusive of gays.
We are superior to no one. Not truly. We have flaws….
Hate no one. Change starts with you. How can we expect acceptance when we are teaching hate ourselves?
thank you K.
insightful and relevant.
just yesterday i had a conversation with my oldest son about closemindedness.
regardless of your particular politics, i advocate that it’s always 100% more productive to be ‘pro’ anything than it is to be ‘anti’ something.
while it may leave you sitting on the same side of the fence either way, the attitude behind the movement is what counts, in my book.
thanks for helping me start my morning off with a realistic perspective.
<3
I don’t think anyone is preaching hate here. I think that it is important to point out those who are making us show disdain for each other so that we can call bullshit when we see it. And even though 75% (probably more) of the politicians and other people in power may be male, that does not an ally make. I never call out the men I love, (i.e. my crew, my dad, my brothers, etc.) but those men are a rare breed in this generation. I call out the inequality of a patriarchal and hyper-sexualized society. And while it may be politically incorrect to call a spade a spade, that does not dissuade me from doing so. It isn’t about preaching hate, it is about saying this is wrong and we should not be supporting this way of thinking.
Why call out any man? Why call out anyone? By calling out a gender rather than another specified category you are only contributing to the hyper-sexualization of our society. Why men? Why not politicians. Or neighbors. Men aren’t the only ones front running this world. Look at Sasha. Look at us. In a year we could be heading nation-wide campaigns for gay rights through this site. So should the opposers call out women?
Wake up kiddo. They call us out every time we try to take any position of power. What about Justice Sotomayor, Sec. of State Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, Annise Parker, Naomi Wolf, Nancy Pelosi… etc? Do you think they are not calling us out EVERY time they vilify ANY woman in a position to make decisions politically or otherwise? I have news for you, the white male would rather a black man work next to them in a chemical plant than a white woman. And they will show them more respect as well. The gave black men whom they hated the right to vote before they gave women the right to vote. Why do you think John Lennon wrote “Woman is the Ni**er of the World”? You are living in a fantasy land if you believe any different. And don’t try to turn my words into a discussion about racism because that has nothing to do with my argument here. The point is that men IN GENERAL hate anything that has to do with feminine qualities unless they can fuck it. I have been fired from a job for being a lesbian in the industry and the reason they gave me was that I was “too direct” and “incapable of learning the job”. Now every employer I have had BEFORE AND SINCE has attested to the fact that I am EXTREMELY capable of learning my job. I was the valedictorian of my hiring class of 20 people – 19 men and me in my current job which is the same type of job. I fight the battle for female rights EVERY DAMN DAY in the trenches so I think you should get a little more experience before preaching at me about how I should feel or think about men. The very fact that my crew of 7 men LOVE me at a job where the only other female on my unit is hated will attest to how well I interact with men. Why do they hate her? Because she displays more feminine qualities than me and shoots down their advances. I am one of the boys, therefore I am cool. Don’t speak with authority of what you don’t know to someone who experiences it daily. My whole point is that we should show our butch sisters more respect and stop based our opinions on feelings derived from men. And you are clearly proving my point because here you are a butchy, telling me how I shouldn’t hate on men just because I denounce their hatred of me. Why do men need YOU to stand up for them? Trust me they wouldn’t stand up against each other for you sweetie.
Maybe you should watch Milk. Respect breeds respect. And acceptance breeds acceptance.
You live life in a movie don’t you? I’ve seen the movie. Do you know why Harvey is dead? Because his respect did not breed respect from the man who shot him. He was hated because he displayed feminine traits. Yes we love him but we love him because he fought what was wrong. He died because he was willing to stand up for something and FIGHT for it. He was not saying or doing what was popular. Now he is dead and you want me to betray his memory by rolling over and singing kumbaya with those who want to eradicate me and my kind from the world. Boy are you naive. And straight men still have no idea who he is… and here we are STILL fighting for our rights 30 years later. Like I said, when you are in the trenches with me then you can criticize me. But you are still worried about the approval from a man who didn’t shake your hand. He hates you for no reason and your respect bred nothing but contempt. I had respect for my co-workers and they threw me under a bus not because of anything I did or didn’t do, but because they were ignorant asshole redneck men. Don’t cast your pearls before swine darlin. Shake the dust off your feet and keep walking with your head held high. You don’t need their approval and neither do I.
You think because you work with a bunch of men in the trenches you’re fighting our fight? Get real. As for my neighbor I didn’t seek nor ask for his approval. You don’t know me or anything I’ve done. I have single-handedly changed rules in my school to be inclusive. I have been a part of and won a campaign to keep fair housing in my area. You work with men? Me too. Congratulations. As for the blog, you’ve taken it ffrom my opinion on hate to you becoming completely defensive about your opinions. So they’re different bfd.
Hey I only defend when I am attacked. My first response was to say that I didn’t think anyone was preaching hatred. You came back with questions, and I answered them. It was not overlooked that your blog title was a play off of one of my previous titles. If you can’t back up your statements I would suggest not making them. As far as how I have fought for our rights in my industry, you have no idea either. Working with men who put rattlesnakes in women’s lockers while the company does nothing about it is a little bit scarier than a high school prom. My mother before me dealt with that exact discrimination in the very same company and doing the job I do now. I come from a long line of women in the feminist movement. And the point was not to get in a pissing contest over who does more. I certainly hope we ALL do more. But when you experience the things WE experience in this fight, you learn a few things about life and what is realistic. You called out my blogs with clear references to the subject AND style of which I wrote them and now you wanna play it off because you got into a debate you can’t win. All I’m saying is if you want to get into a judgment match, you should be able to defend your position with facts and reason, not fantasy and rose colored glasses. As far as this conversation goes, I’m done. I have more important things to concern myself with. There are no hard feelings towards you on my part here. You are entitled to your opinions, but I will let you know that I love a good debate and if my opinions are questioned (which you did in fact do in your comments even AFTER the blog you claim that was not in reference to my previous blogs) I WILL defends them and there WILL be reasons to support them. I’m just sayin…