Card Carrying Lesbian … What’s in your wallet?

Seeking New Best Friend on Craigslist

Posted on 22. Mar, 2009 by Sasha.

I have always found it difficult to get close to other women and form those tight-knit friendships i’ve always been so envious of. You know the kind; where a group of girls are all best friends, constantly together, call each other to discuss the most mundane detail of their lives, never fearing that they’re intruding, boring or interrupting one another. Because even if they are, that’s what friends are for.

I’ve had a couple “best friends” over the years. One from Jr. high-school that I’m still close to, but she moved out of state, is straight, married and the mother of two. So you can imagine that we don’t have that much in common anymore.

The other one was my best friend throughout college and grad school but sex, lies and misunderstandings followed by more lies ended that friendship in a blaze of tears, yelling and slamming doors. I haven’t spoken to her since. Which saddens me because I was positive we would be friends till our last breath.  We had that sort of magical friendship that usually only happens when you’re five. The kind that every discussion disintegrates into a giggle fest and you can finish each others sentences or read each other like a book without even saying a word. That sort of friendship is rare.

Which brings me to my current situation of being in serious need of a replacement best friend. Huh, easier said then done. It even occurred to me to take out a craigslist ad. It might read something like this:

Seeking new best friend to take the place of old broken one. Must be honest, loyal, kind, love animals of all kinds. Vegetarians get bonus points. MUST get along with my girlfriend amazingly well but not be the least bit attracted to her AT ALL.

Please be a LESBIAN or a very GAY boy that enjoys going to art galleries, museums, coffee shops and thinks that bookstores are a little slice of heaven. Lesbians holding any post grad degrees will be given special attention in the application process even if it was in women’s studies. Or at least be well read and well spoken in areas of spirituality, philosophy or anything that matters more then what new STD Paris Hilton may have.

Age, race, appearance does not matter. I don’t care what you do for a living as long as you enjoy it and don’t complain about it on a daily basis. Please be overly optimistic as I am easily brought down by pissy people.

Also please please live within a 10 mile radius of my house since I hate to drive and would just love to be able to say, “I’ll be there in ten minutes” at the drop of hat when you have some lesbian drama emergency that calls for the immediate attention of a best friend. In which case I will jump on my beach cruiser and swoop in to save the day.

New best friend must be quick to laugh, slow to anger, and also in need of a new BFF.

Ummmm …… I really do miss having a best friend. I’m almost willing to post that ad just to see if anyone responds!

Continue Reading

No Strings Attached …. Uh huh …. I’m sure that’ll work.

Posted on 30. Jun, 2008 by Sasha.

When two women agree on a no strings attached, friends with benefits, don’t ask don’t tell policy attached to their pseudo relationship/”we’re only friends” friendship; what does that say about them?

Does that say that one or both of them are:

• Cheaters looking for an easy, almost honest way to keep sleeping around?
• Incapable of commitment?
• Too horny not to grope each other whenever the opportunity strikes?
• Simply afraid of commitment for any number of neurotic personal issues that they seem unable to fix, medicate or ignore at this time?
• That they’re just not that into one another and are using each other to pass the time till something better comes along?
• Or my personal favorite: One of them is a user and the other one is an idiot?
• When someone agrees to an NSA situation does that say something about her self esteem or does it just say she’s a slut?
• Does it say that she’s so hung up on someone that she’s willing to sacrifice what she really wants for just a little taste of the real thing?

I suppose any and all of those are possibilities depending on the situation. I’ll even go as far as saying that the reasons for a NSA relationship could be fluid. Meaning that the motivation for staying in such a situation could fluctuate from one day to the next. She may have agreed to it because she was so into you, she didn’t want to lose you. But as time goes on and other women look her way, she might start to see it differently. More like an advantage than a compromise.

So I’m curious to know, how do you feel about NSA relationships? And I’m not talking about one night stands with people you met on Craigslist. I mean a long-term agreement between two women to be friends, but have commitment free sex whenever one or both of them want it.

Is this a good idea gone bad? Or can there be mutually beneficial factors for everyone involved?

Continue Reading