By Guest Writer, Elegy
I’ve got a sensitive nose, especially when it comes to most modern perfumes. You see, they use alcohol as their base, and I just. Can’t. STAND IT. 9 times out of 10, I’ll only smell the alcohol, with some notes of the intended scent. OMG, just douse yourself and carry on. Ahem, I know, you love your chosen scent- what is it again? Maybe I’d like it. I’d only get a sample though, since I’m unconvinced.
So, of holier-than-though-sniffing-down-at-us-nostril, what IS it you can find joy in? Oh, glad you ask, it replies since I am now typing with my nose. OILS! Bring back the oils! If you must wear perfume, make it the old fashioned cologne of the last century. But yes, back to oils. I love oils. Why? Well, no alcohol for one so I can actually pick up the scent I’m meant to smell- that’s always a plus.
Oils are just more personal to me. You dab them on your temples, your neck and chest, your wrists. They also work as deodorant when applied to the underarms (shower first, obviously, then apply as much as you like). And! You can add them to your hair! The oils provide such a personal scent, they mix seamlessly with your body’s own natural pheromones. It’s like announcing your presence and leaving a trace behind when you leave a room. You know, what perfumes are meant to do. Talk about lingering and mystery. Not being able to identify a scent can drive a person wild.
A gender neutral scent for the butches, bois, and those who don’t like their personal scents to be flowery:
For you, I suggest you start with “Egyptian musk.” There are a variety of formulas that carry this name, it is a strong scent so cutting it with other oils (almond oil, for example) is recommended if you don’t like it straight out of the bottle. It’s also fairly inexpensive.
For the femmes:
Ah, there are a lot of options, but this femme likes to keep some mystery so instead I’m going to point you in a different, but similar direction: scented shea butter as a personal scent. There are some great (vegan!) sources on Etsy. These are effective as perfumes, as well as moisturizing. Yes, you can do all the things with these that you can do with the oils, and you don’t have to worry about additives messing with your hair. It’s mostly whipped shea butter and chosen scents.
Also, yes- I would recommend the “Egyptian musk” for you too- it really is neutral! (I have experienced this on both a man and a woman, two entirely different results). Just remember, a little goes a LONG way, and if you want to apply it as a femme, I would definitely cut it or apply substantially less so the scent is thinner.
For the DIY crowd:
You can just buy your own favorite scents and blend them into your perfect signature scent! Hop onto Amazon, Google, Etsy, or the website of your choice and look up “therapeutic grade” “undiluted” essential oils. I plan to go this route with the shea butter option myself.
As a general note: most of the amazing oils I’ve gotten did not cost more than 15 dollars, averaging at 5 dollars or less.
ooo yay! i have the same reaction to most perfumes! prolly bc i am allergic to almost all, and have one *sobs* i can wear. but again the alcohol is harsh to me so i hardly ever wear it. i do a lot of shea butter. ill have to try oils though!
Elegy, another great post! I also love oils, and I’ve bought many on Etsy. I like creating my own combos, and coming up with new ways to wear them. BTW: I always look forward to reading your posts. You don’t just write about lesbian-oriented subjects, like some of the other guest writers. You’re very versatile: from revealing red hose to red-hot scents – you’re an out-of-the-box babe.
So of course we have yet another slightly odd thing in common.
I have been a long time perfume-holic. I used to be obsessed with expensive perfumes. Partly for their bottles, partly for the ads (I’m a weird advertising junkie of perfume ads) and partly for the mystery I felt the right scent can give a woman. Something about people being able to sense her even after she’s left the room. Just slightly ….
However, I suffer from migraines and cluster headaches that are triggered by almost everything. Chemicals being one. I used to be under the false assumption that if a perfume cost me a hundred dollars for 1/8th of an oz that surely it would be comprised of only the best ingredients! Right??? Wrong.
Thanks to trademark secrecy laws, perfumes don’t have to disclose all of their ingredients. Even if they’re harmful!!! In fact many of the most expensive perfumes in the world contain harmful chemicals.
Anyhoo … I could go on for days. But basically, I finally had to give up my perfume collection to my very happy mother, who was more then willing to take them off my hands.
So my search for ALL NATURAL perfumes began. It’s harder then you might think.
I’ll get off my soap box and just give you the links to the only 2 companies I have found that make fragrances I 1) actually really like 2) don’t make me sick.
The first is Lavanila: My favorites are the vanilla coconut and the vanilla blackberry. http://www.lavanila.com/The-Healthy-Fragrance-Vanilla-Coconut_p_7.html
Oddly enough butches and men love the coconut one most. Femmes and straight girlfriends prefer the blackberry one more!
http://www.lavanila.com/The-Healthy-Fragrance-Vanilla-Blackberry_p_104.html
Then to change it up a bit or when I want a lighter fragrance I go with Pacifica. Most specifically the blood orange. But I have all of them. But blood orange and ruby guava and mexican cocoa are my faves!!!
http://www.pacificaperfume.com/spray-perfume/tuscan-blood-orange-spray-perfume
It’s also a little easier on the pocket and you can try several and mix them. I like mixing it with the quava one. Yummmy!!!!
Besides that, you still have to be careful about perfume oils. Most are still made of synthetic fragrances, so always ask if you’re not sure. And then again, some synthetic fragrances don’t cause massive headaches for everyone. So just go with what works for you.
Sasha, I also love Lavanila. In fact, vanilla is my favorite scent. FYI: Many Etsy sellers, use natural ingredients in their concoctions. I could give you a long list of my beloved oils, but I won’t. Half the fun of finding a new scent, is searching for it yourself.
NOOOOOOO … share!!!!! I’ve been trolling Etsy debating between about 3 sellers …. and one I’m dying for, even if it’s not 100% natural is Unicorn Farts!!!! LOL
Tell me your top 3 etsy stores for natural fragrance, if you don’t mind sharing your secrets!
I’ve been somewhat addicted to Obsession since I was about 17…it really blends to perfection with my own body chemistry and a little goes a long way and the scent lasts all day in a nice low-key way (I’ve reunited with people from 15+ years ago and had them tell me that every time they smelled it they thought of me a smiled =). For the last ten years though, I’ve switched to only wearing that only in the fall/winter because it’s such a rich, deep, warm scent. For spring/summer, I’ve used a few different ones – Myliu (a cheapie from Maurices), Cool Waters, and most recently, Ed Hardy. Friends always come up and grab me and take a great big whiff so it must be fairly pleasant to others lol
Mmmm ………. yes the way perfumes mix with each woman’s body chemistry gives each woman her own unique scent even if others try to wear the same fragrance, it won’t smell exactly the same.
I used to wear Ralph Lauren’s Safari in high school and then I favored several fragrances from Armani throughout college. Oh and thierry mugler angel was a gift from an ex. I didn’t really like it but wore it for them. But the headaches were killer.
OMG I could list about 20 more I used to love. Still do, but just can’t handle them. 
I really wish I could, this blog is making me miss them. 
Okay. So my favorite scents to wear are True Force from Avon, Burberry Summer, and Burberry London. Now, the absolute fragrance to smell on my girlfriend is Burberry. It’s a glass bottle with gold looking fragrance inside and a gold lid.
Scents always smell different on different people, but that one on her literally makes me drool. She also wears one from Coach that smells incredible.
Ah, I have been thinking about how to get a natural fragrance I liked since hearing about the toxic chemicals that are in most perfumes that mess with your hormones. My current favorite is coco vanille by Sud Pacifique, but I don’t know if it’s natural. I’m almost out, so maybe I’ll try one of the above. Thanks for the post!
I’ve been wanting to try Sud Pacifique but haven’t been able to get a definite ingredients list. They allude to natural ingredients but unless I can read it with my own eyes, I’m skeptical.
Has anyone tried Carol’s Daughter?
Sasha, I’m always happy to share scents. Here are a few faves on Etsy. I think that they also have their own sites (sorry, my links wouldn’t work): 1. AlchemicMuse: Their Blackstrap perfume oil smells enticingly edible. It makes my mate drool, and my cats purr, 2. solsticescents: I love their Spellbound Woods, Conjure, Cenobite and Foxcroft. Their scents are very sensual, complex, and woodsy. I think that these sellers use natural ingredients. They’re both wonderful women, and love to answer any questions. When I have more time, I’ll add to the list. Enjoy! (Unicorn Farts sounds fab.)
I love Carol’s Daughter. I’ve used their haircare line, and it smells incredible. Sephora gives samples.
Oh thank you Ricki ….heading over to Etsy now
…. I think I have my own etsy store just to pay for my Etsy addiction.
Sasha, you’re most welcome! Please let me know, if you purchase any of their scents. I’d like to compare (perfume) notes. I’m almost ready to start a store, too. I usually buy and sell on eBay, but I’ve become an Etsy addict. Fortunately, it’s not illegal and only hurts my wallet.
I am an actual perfume whore. I’ll wear every perfume I can probably all at the same time.
Lol Effi! That sounds like a perfume orgy to me.
Ricki – AlchemicMuse is closed for vacation!
but I did see they were already on my favorite list. And I am currently considering a few different ones from Solsticescents …. I will let you know how that turns out! Again, thank you! I get overwhelmed looking on Etsy for new perfume. There’s soooooo many!! I’m currently obsessing over whether or not to try this one also : http://www.etsy.com/listing/76500034/to-bee-natural-perfume-honey-pot-for-the?
I am a self-confessed perfume whore as well. My collection is mind boggling. I don’t like most of the new fragrances (especially the celebrity ones) because, as Elegy pointed out, their base if alcohol but more so because their notes are synthetic. I can sniff out a synthetic scent like a blood hound and if there is even a single one, I won’t wear it on my skin. I do, however, like the smell of new Barbie doll’s hair, and have been searching for a fragrance that replicates it so I can wear it in my hair. I realize it will likely be synthetic, but hair doesn’t have the same chemicals as skin, so it likely wouldn’t dry down to spell like bug spray. I believe in layering fragrance. Perfumed body creams and then different fragrances to dab on each body part. I will dab one perfume between my toes, wear something else in the groin area, something else again behind my ears, and I always spray the air and whip my hair up through the mist. I even sometimes like to add in a men’s fragrance just for something different. Pheromone used to be my signature scent. Talk about staying behind once you leave. People at work used to tell me they could tell I’d been in the bathroom, break room or elevator. Don’t wear it much anymore though, I’ve moved on, I’m such a whore. Moroccan Oil has a wonderful scent to it. You can use it on your neck and decolletage for satin skin. I also like the Claire Burke’s Original scent perfume. Wear that on your clothes and not your skin. It never breaks down and gets old so it turns the pieces you don’t dry clean after every wear into sachets for your wardrobe. Of course, mixing the old tried and true Jo Malone essences is a lot of fun to experiment with. This is a subject I can go on for days about, so I’ll stop here. Great post, Elegy!
Yum! I’m adding Honey Pot to my faves. I’m also overwhelmed, by the plethora of products. I have a suggestion, though, to narrow it down. In the search bar, I type in a list like: vanilla, coffee, fig etc… It narrows down the fragrance field, and it’s more manageable. Effi, I can relate – I’m a scent slut.
Oh, and Moroccan Oil has a hairspray that is out of this world. One day I had just sprayed my hair and it wafted through my open front door. A lady walking her dog actually came to my front gate to ask what it was. My favorite men’s fragrance that I sometimes put just one drop at the nape of my neck is Cartier Santos. It smells like money.
Omg, Honey Pot sounds amazing. I have to stop reading this post/comments. My pocketbook is groaning.
Rexie, I love Moroccan Oil, in my hair and on my skin. I’ve been wanting to try Jo Malone. Do you have any scent suggestions? I’d appreciate them. I also enjoy layering fragrances. Again, Elegy, great post. Thanks!
Ricki, ANY of her essences are awesome. They are all so good it’s difficult to pick just one. It depends on what you’re doing. The citrus is good for spring time day, the fruity is good for having fun like happy hour, spicy is great for night time. The new grapefruit is edible. I mix them and come up with something different every time. They are very light, but very “juicy”.
Wow – I am so impressed with you all. Mixing oils, and finding all these unique or natural ingredients….
I wear a scent from Victoria’s Secret (more for summer), and one from Calvin Klein (the rest of the seasons). They both just feel like ‘me.’ I use them sparingly, and in places that you’d have to be close to notice…I don’t leave a ‘trail.’ I also use the matching lotions and soaps. Such a traditional girl…lol. You guys are so creative!
Athena’s Home Novelties sells a gender neutral pheromone oil that smells different on every single person. It contains pheromones which naturally attract people to you and make them treat you better…no kiddding, it works! I’ve noticed a difference when I don’t wear it. My wife and I both wear it daily. It smells slightly musky on her and like pear on me. It’s awesome, I love it! You can wear it alone or layer it with your favorite scent. I just had to mention it, as we haven’t let ourselves run out of it in 3 years..lol
Rexie, thanks! I appreciate your suggestions. It’s so much fun to create combos. It reminds me a little of dying clothes. (Another obsession. Hint: maybe Elegy can write about it.) Will that purple mix with the lavender, and look lovely? Or, will it be a blah blend? It’s all experimentation. Same thing with scents. You lightly spritz – and hope that you smell sensational. If not, you wash it off and start over. Jul, I know what you mean about the “trail.” I’ve been to yoga classes, where women leave “trails” all over the mats. Yuck. In public places, keep your stinky scent to yourself.
*weebles at Ricki* *sniff* :.( Granted, I don’t wear fragrance other than deodorant to work out in, but I do love it when I go somewhere and when I open my car door, out pours a cloud of whatever I’m wearing, only to disappear like a silk scarf in the wind.
Great post Elegy. Great fun topic! My favorites- Star, Pabla Picasso, Tommy Girl, Angels by Victoria Secrets to name a few. I have a drawer full of perfumes- liquids and powders and lotions. Love it!
I grew up in a scentless home due to my mom getting headaches from scents. Even now, when i see her, when alll im wearing is deoderant, ill get a “youre wearing some kind of perfume, what are you wearing?” Sorry mom, not going au naturale just for you.
I too get headaches from heavy scents so i rarely wear a scent. I do like vanilla and many years ago i bought i think it was called “armani code” for a guy friend. One night we went out and i decided to put some on myself and shortly after bought it for me. I like a muskier scent. I loathe fruity smells and truly cant stand anything Chanel. It’s too damned strong (yep i get headaches from scents now too).
Does anyone else love the smell of Irish Spring?
Exquisite.
No offense, but I’ve always loathed Irish Springs. Perhaps, it’s because of that silly commercial: “Manly, yes, but I like it too!” Elegy, I’m dying to read about your dyeing experiment. (Sorry, couldn’t resist pun.) I’d suggest buying dyes at Dharma Trading Company online. They have an amazing selection of dyes – including, ravishing reds!
Forgot to ask, does anyone else have a soap obsession? I also collect scented soaps, and would appreciate suggestions.
Okay, well first of all: holy crap, I didn’t expect this one to be so well received (namely, “Scents? Really? Why are you so boring??”).
Sasha:
It’s not to say that I’m still learning it, but I am certainly reaffirming this regularly.
“However, I suffer from migraines and cluster headaches that are triggered by almost everything. Chemicals being one. I used to be under the false assumption that if a perfume cost me a hundred dollars for 1/8th of an oz that surely it would be comprised of only the best ingredients! Right??? Wrong.”
I had to learn that the hard way, too.
The term “blood orange” just sounds appealing. And lucky for me it’s more in my price range. 58 dollars (for the blackberry) made my inner reaction have a dramatic fainting spell.
Speaking of celebrity scents:
I noticed that if I love the presentation of the perfume bottle(color scheme and design), I probably will not be a fan of the scent (or I’ll loathe it). If I’m unimpressed by the bottle, I’ll probably find the scent all right, or even appealing. No fair. And these bottles aren’t like the old ones where you could just pour the solution out and play switch. Hmph.
Oh! And you know there is a scent out there based on the smell of a brand new book? It sounds awesome, but the price! Seriously, why??
Unicorn Farts…. Ha, still laughing at that one.
On soaps:
No, I can’t yet say I’m soap obsessed. What I do like are those creative folks who devote their time to creating realistic molds and colors for soaps so they look like something else. Pasta soap, fruit soap, table set soap, cake soap, everything!
Also, thanks for the dye tip, Ricki. I’m looking up the supplies I’ll need, and I think I’ll need to remove some color from these (I’m pretty sure they were colored? Don’t want to risk the dye not taking) so that means I’ll need a gas mask with a dual cartridge designed for acid as well as the proper chemical for nylons (begins with an F, don’t remember it offhand but I’ve sourced it).
Can I admit I like the smell of Axe? Should I run and hide now?
Nah, that’s fine with me. I still have some men’s deodorant I keep locked up in a medicine cabinet. I don’t remember if it’s Axe or not, but in small doses it smelled so nice. No judgement here!
Elegy, it sound like you’re preparing to go into combat! It’s good to have protection from toxic chemicals, I recommend it. I don’t have any experience in removing color from clothes. Good luck, and tell us all about it.
Hmm…Irish Spring (Kirsten) and new Barbie hair (Rexie). I would never have thought of those : )
Le Occitane makes a lemon Verbena spray (it may be natural, not sure), it smells wonderful, but doesn’t last very long, but the short time I can breathe in that wonderful smell is worth it.
Ricki – IDK if Jo Malone is natural, but I have six fragrances from them, bought in pairs that layer well together. I’ll try to remember to look and see what they are so I can pass that on to you.
Carnal Flower by Frederic Malle @ Barneys is very earthy, unique and fairly light. Might be nartural, not sure. One of my top 3 faves.
It looks like I’m kind of a fragrance fool, too.
Anybody have any votes for colognes? I’m going to try WWG’s suggestion for Axe and Rexie’s Cartier when I want to smell like money, ha, ha!
Not so much into soaps, but what about lotions? Sasha, I tried the Blood Orange from Pacifica and love it. There’s a natural lotion (no parabens, etc.) you might like from Deep Steep that has that wonderful scent of oranges. Can’t remember the name, but I’ll try to remember to find it.
Ricki – Jo Malone’s French Lime Blossom & Grapefruit both smell great together, but especially nice together. A heavier duo, nice for winter, is Pomegranate Noir & Nectarine Blossom and Honey.
Sasha – The Deep Steep body lotion I mentioned is Tangerine & Melon.
Thanks, Kenda! I’m definitely gonna buy one of her scents soon. I like lotions, too. I loved your sexy story, and look forward to Part Two.
Sasha, I just wanted to tell you, that AlchemicMuse on Etsy is back in business! They reopened their store today. I highly recommend, their whipped soaps and perfume oils.
The Body Shop. White Musk Oil. I have worn it for years and always get asked what im wearing-once i was asked by a very hot girl ‘god what is that horny perfume you are wearing?’ lmao loving this blog just found it yesterday xx
Ohh, ladies, what a topic! I always love the perfume smell on you all. So lovely, all of you ladies!
Thank you!
I mean I love the smell of perfume on a woman…not that I know any of you…please…