Signs you may have accidentally gotten married:
The first step onto this slippery slope is have her move in. Then the rest is a quick slide downhill. Witness the domino effect:
You join Costco together and one of you has to fill out the “spousal info” or even worse, as in our case, she fills it out for you, because she has ALL your information memorized better then you.
She puts you on her insurance and you’re put on as her wife. 🙁
You guys rush home from dinner with friends because you have to walk the kids.
You have a house that you’re now remodeling together and you spend too much time in the paint aisle at Home Depot arguing about shades of yellow.
You start getting mail addressed to both of you.
Strangers assume you’re “domestic partners” when you wonder how they figured out you’re even gay!?
What’s even worse is that people start calling you “partners” instead of “girlfriends” …. WTF??? You’re not 50!
You realize you don’t ever want to become one of those annoying couples that dress alike as you sit there looking at each other and realize you’re wearing matching house slippers.
You start worrying that your mothers may not get along at family functions.
You bake extra cookies so she can take some to work with her the next day. Then immediately feel as if you’re a 1950’s housewife. Albeit a lesbian housewife.
You hate being called domesticated but mostly because it’s getting harder and harder to deny.
So what’s an accidently married couple to do to break out of the mold?? I’m not sure yet. But you can be damn sure I’m going to figure it out because I’ll be a monkey’s mother before I become half of a boring pseudo-married couple.
Mmmmm …. I don’t know I think this calls for some daring public sex to liven things up a bit. Maybe even at Costco! ……. Oh gawd. Somebody shoot me.
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You don’t sound to thrilled about “marriage” I know you’re not really married but are you sure you’re ok with even living together? It sounds like you really miss single life.
OMG A COSTCO CARD???? What’s next? Adopting an african baby? lol
Does this mean no more crazy ex drama or one night stands in WeHo? I miss that. You were my idol. I guess the bigger they are the harder they fall.
I saw some comments about you dancing. Are you a dancer too? What kind of dancing? Be still my beating heart …. are you a stripper?? Please oh please let the answer be YES!!!! I’ll hire you anyday.
Remind me again how long you’ve been together? 😉 I must say after reading your blog a few months ago it’s kind of funny to read this post.
Hi Judith … ummmmm….. (mumbling) ….. a little over 3 months. …. I know I know!!!! That’s SOOOO soon and SOOOO gay. But to our credit we’ve known each other for about 8 months. We keep telling ourselves 8 months to make us feel better.
3 MONTHS!!!!! WTF doll face?? That’s nuts. The infatuation will fade and you’ll be left wondering how the hell you ended up with a room mate.
This is really funny to me. I think I was one of the first girls you ever dated. I remember going out with you and we NEVER went home alone. We always had our pick of playthings to take home with us. I can’t believe you’ve closed your bedroom doors to the masses. Wow. She must really be some catch.
Don’t sweat it. 3 months in lesbian time is almost two years. 😎
Breaking the mold? lol
well take her to a nice pub, or restaurant and when she excuses herself to the bathroom.. Provided its just one of the one stall things some places have.. follow her into the restroom.. wild kinky sex in the bathroom…
fun times indeed!
I find it really irritating that people gay and straight generally equate marriage with “boring”. I’m married and me and my wife are both 27, both still active, and we’re the same people we were before we got married. If you are bored in a marriage its not marriages fault its YOUR fault for being in the mindset that a ring on your finger means that all of a sudden everything changes and you have to behave in a different way. Its utter nonsense. The only thing that has really changed for us besides the fact we live together is that we don’t screw other people (although 3somes and other sexual deviancys are NEVER out of the question, we’re married not dead) and one of usually knows where the other is. Take some personal responsibility for your own happiness, and don’t be a sheep that buys into the bullshit. Marriage is what you make it.
” ‘domestic partners’ ” when you wonder how they figured out you’re even gay!? ” That is too funny,
But I guess it’s the truth. When you’re happy it shows. “If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands!” LOL