You all brought up so many good points about the type of wedding we’re going to have. Is it sacrificing our individuality for tradition? Is giving into pressure to prove something really just selling out? Is it even worth it to spend all that money just to prove to our straights, that our marriage is as legitimate as theirs? I don’t know ….. well …. here’s my thought process:
First of all, don’t worry about us losing ourselves in a big wedding. There is no way I would allow it to ever get too traditional. Big poufy Cinderella wedding gowns are not my style. And to be honest, whenever something starts to seem too traditional it makes me want to yack. So even if we do spend the extra money to make it a little more elaborate, I promise you it will be as creative as possible.
As far as our BIG GAY WEDDING goes … big is subjective. To us a big wedding would be going from a 20 person guest list in the desert to maybe 70. But I realize that 70 is still considered a “small wedding” by most standards. I have come to the conclusion that I would rather spend more money per person and make sure that every guest has a great time. Then cut costs here and there just to have more people.
But there is one way that I feel we’re sacrificing and it’s a pretty big way at that! We really want to be married. NOW. I hate having to wait to throw a big bash for all our friends and family just to be Mrs. Remi.
My friend Lana recently said, “You guys barely have any rights as it is! I think the smart thing would be for you two to go ahead and fill out the paper work so you’re both protected, if God forbid anything to were happen in the mean time.”
Which is exactly what we’ve been thinking. Why not fill out the domestic partnership papers before the actual wedding? We’ve already lived together for 2 years as a married couple, but without any of the benefits that domestic partnership provides. Such as tax breaks in CA. And if we’re planning on waiting almost 2 years for the big day then that’s just a lot of freakin’ money we’re just flushing down the California tax drain for no good reason.
There is only one real reason we’re holding off. Because we don’t want people to lose their excitement for our wedding. We want people to still feel like it’s important and special. But we worry that if we’re already “married” before the wedding then people will feel either cheated or like it’s redundant. Cheated that they didn’t get to actually see us get married or redundant because we already are.
When I voiced my concerns to Lana she said, “That’s stupid! That’s paperwork and it’s for your guys’ protection. The wedding day is just the big celebration. What about when straight people get their marriage license before the wedding? It’s the same sort of thing. I think you guys should just do it. People that love you would understand.”
That is why Lana is my best friend. She made excellent points, all of which we had already been batting around at home. What do you think? Do you think if we filled out domestic partnership papers now, it would take away from the joy of the actual wedding?
Then there’s this …. Remi’s job recently adopted a new take on the family leave act to include domestic partners!!! Which means that if I’m really sick and need her to take care of me, she can call off from work and it can NOT be used against her!!! Which is something that she really likes, because there are days that she doesn’t feel it’s safe for me to be left alone. Even though those are few and far between, it’s so nice that if we sign those papers, I’d be covered under the family leave act!
My other thought/hope on this is that by the time the wedding date rolls around, Prop 8 will have been overturned and if we’re already domestic partners, it won’t take anything away from it because we’ll be getting legally married!
So yea. Those are my thoughts and my fears. We want to do the domestic partnership thing NOW so that we can take advantage of the few rights we would have: tax breaks, family leave act, insurance plans, hospital visitation (if God forbid anything happened) and stuff like that. Oh and let’s not forget, the biggest reason to do this: so I don’t have to call her my fiance anymore. She can me my actual wife. 
Actually I think I’m more excited about being called her wife. 
The question I guess it this: Do you think that if we sign domestic partnership papers now, for all the logical, real world reasons ….. that it will take away from the wedding day? I guess I liked what Lana said, that the wedding day is the big celebration of our marriage. It doesn’t matter if it’s not done on the same day we sign the papers.
So why shouldn’t we go ahead and do it, and then we can still plan and save for our dream wedding …. without any stress! Please tell me what you think about this. We’re torn.
I think it will take away from it if you start calling each other “wife”.
I don’t think you should start that until the actual ceremony happens. I do think it’d be redundant, as you put it, to have a wedding when you’re already considered married to each other, in every sense.
But, if you’re purely wanting to do the paperwork for financial/security reasons, then I say go for it. After all, that is just paper work.
Sorry Crystal, but I disagree. I think her friend Lana was point on. With so few rights afforded to us as it is, and domestic partnership is the only way to access what we do have, it seems to me that they should go ahead and sign the papers now. But still have a big wedding with their family when they can afford it.
What about straight couples that elope and then still have a huge blow out wedding for their families because their families want to see them get married? No one ever tells them it’s redundant!
Or what about all the straight people that renew their vows, complete with white wedding dress and cake and guests!? No one calls them redundant.
I think Remi & Sasha should go ahead and do this if it makes them feel better. I for one, wouldn’t at all feel that should give up their actual wedding day because of it.
I think you guys should do it! What if Sasha gets sick (bipolar sick I mean, no offense) and she needs Remi to be able to sign something or take off work?? To me this is about taking care of each other and isn’t that what marriage is all about anyways?
And god damnit, still throw your big wedding day! Lana was right. One doesn’t take away from the other.
See!!!! That’s what I was afraid of … what Crystal said.
Never mind.
Nah, nah, nah, you’ve got me all wrong….
What I was saying was that you should actually do the paperwork part now, because of all the reasons you said, but you shouldn’t start using the ‘wife’ label until you have the ceremony with everybody.
My brother and his wife filled out the paperwork for their marriage months before they actually had their wedding ceremony, because he wanted her to get his benefits from him being in the military.
They just had the paperwork done, but didn’t consider themselves husband/wife until their wedding day.
I see both sides to this. But my rational side says do it. Sign the papers. Be protected. Be happy. Be married!
If anyone can’t see that your wedding day is a celebration of your commitment to each other, regardless of when you made it, isn’t being fair.
I’m with Lampley on this one. No one calls breeders redundant when they have multiple ceremonies.
My sister got married to her husband in Bermuda, they eloped. Then they had to have a ceremony in New York for his family and another one in Cali for our side. She had 3 f’n weddings and no one called her redundant. Fuck they made her do it!
Why shouldn’t Sasha have “two” weddings? Just because she’s gay?? I call bullshit.
@ Crystal …. OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I see …. I like that …..
@ SD Stud, tons of my cousins have multiple wedding celebrations too. Well, one wedding (in the temple) and then a reception in Utah usually and then one here in cali and sometimes they even have to fly out to Samoa or Hawaii and do it all over again for the parts of the family out there. And you’re right … no one thinks anything of it. It’s expected actually.
Sasha – We went through this exact dilemma. Trust me, it will NOT detract from your wedding day one bit, unless you decide it’s going to. Registering as domestic partners in California is so anti-climactic, it’s not even funny. You both sign a piece of paper, get it notarized (we went to a copy store, I’m not kidding), and send it in to the state. Your friends and family don’t even have to know you did it, and it would provide an enormous safety net for you. Don’t screw around with delaying family leave benefits, etc. – go ahead and register, get yourself protected. Then throw your bash of whatever size makes you the happiest when you are good and ready – sure, hold off on wedding rings, etc. until the wedding, but why put off a little added security? And yes, if Prop 8 is overturned by that time, icing on the cake!
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just hold on a second….
I think you should file for domestic partnership NOW. As in tomorrow, not next week. Lana was spot on the money in her thinking.
You might have a little get together with a few close friends (LANA) one the day your partnership is made made legal. No big fan fare but just something to mark the day and the lovely couple’s happiness. Domestic partnership is NOT marriage. Nope. It’s not. So you wouldn’t BE married, and therefore your wedding wouldn’t be anti-climatic.
You will BE married after you wed one another. In two years. Who knows? Same sex marriage may be legal in Cali in two years, so it might actually be a really real wedding (and not the pandering watered-down gay version). Who in the heck would ever deny you that happiness? Anybody who loved you would be overjoyed to share your day. Killjoys can just stay home.
J. Lampley was also spot on. People have extravagant ceremonies to renew their vows all the time and all of their friends and family come and celebrate just as if it were the first one. I know there’s one couple so happy to be in love and together that they get married EVERY year on their anniversary, and their friends and loved ones come to share their joy each year. A wedding is so much more than just making the first committment to eachother in front of a dutiful audience. It is a celebration of the rare love you have for eachother. This is Sasha and Remi we’re talking about, two people who found love in a world that is too often loveless. You beat the odds, you won the love lottery. If you want to dress fancy and serve free food and drinks to all lucky enough to get an invite, who in their right minds couldn’t get on board with that?
I command you. File domestic partnership now and then plan your ultimate wedding at a later date of your choosing.
Now! I said.
LOL Rexie!!! I love it!!!! I’m so making Remi read ALL of these comments tonight.
Oh but then I have another question … if were were to file the papers … should we tell people? Like you know that would be KILLER hard on me NOT to blog about.
I have a big mouth about stuff like that.
It’s one little piece of paper…I cannot stress enough the utter lack of fanfare involved…we sent ours in and then got a “congrats” letter from the state a few weeks later. Whoop-di-f*cking-do. So, yeah, tell people! Blog away! Your wedding will be no less special as a result.
This is where my over-thinking EVERYTHING starts to drive me crazy!!! I get all caught up in the, “and then what?”s and try to figure everything out ten moves in advance. That usually only insures one thing … insomnia.
@ Natalie … thank you. It’s nice to hear advice from someone who’s already done it!
I don’t think it’s a huge deal to tell people.
Anyone would understand why you’re doing this if you explained it to them. I really don’t think anyone would be less excited for your actual wedding because of it.
It’s like if your birthday is on a Wednesday, but you’re having your party on Saturday….people are still going to say “happy birthday” at the party.
LOL .. excellent point Crystal.
Geez … how did I get such freakin’ awesome readers!!!??? I’m so glad you’re such an intelligent group. It saves me a lot of time. lol
No way girlie – you cannot let this thing push you down that slippery slope. It’s a piece of paper. Sign it. Have it notarized. Mail it in. Pat yourselves on the back when the state sends you its incredibly unexciting letter of congratulations. Then sing from the rooftops that you’re registered and protected…and then enjoy your wedding in 6 months, or a year, or two years for the very sacred and amazing day it will be!
Crystal – I adore your birthday analogy.
Do the domestic partnership.
And from one over thinking person to another: Stop. Just look at your words, what you want to do (even if it’s just by one percent more than your doubts) and do it. Live to question it later. ;P
I ADORE this idea!!! I think you guys should “elope” and have a private ceremony, just for you two. Get the paper work done and then get to planning your gorgeous wedding with all the creative flair you can muster!
What about your name? Will you take her name? Oh how romantic!!!!!
Gina, YESSSSS I would take her name!!!
But then that would make it hard to keep it a secret
???
Do you have any idea what i would do to even have something like domestic partnership in Ohio!!!!!!!!! Me and mine have been together for going on 3 years. She wears my ring. And it kills me that i don’t have the money to fill out ALL the legal papers to just give basic rights that married people get. I can’t even get her covered on my health insurance. She got sick last year and because I’m not her legal blood even though I’m her emergency contact her parents have rights over me in this state. For 3 weeks I didn’t know what was going on until her sister filled me in. Her parents are not real big on her “choices” in life. If all it took to make that not happen ever again was a piece of paper and 50 buck……
I say march down to the clerks office Monday
Ok whew… sorry I am tardy to the party on this one but here is my take. Do it. And as far as telling people anything if you want to at all, just tell them you filed for a domestic partnership registration in preparation for your upcoming wedding. It will sound all legalese like a wedding license and most heteros won’t have a clue what that entails because they are too self-absorbed to really understand or care.
I like the way you think Raye.
I think your plan makes a lot of sense for so many reasons. The family leave act, taking the stress of you- you’ll already be married and planning for the wedding will feel lighter in a way because of that. Honestly, I was going to suggest something like this earlier- eloping sort of speak- because I know several hetero couples who took this route and said doing this totally relieved the “big day focus” pressure off of them. (Actually I am photographing for a friend this month who is doing this at city hall for the same reasons (but in a hetero way lol) taxes, insurance, take “big day focus” stress off etc then they’re having a bigger ceremony later.) Sasha, your plan for signing the domestic partnership papers etc also makes sense for all the other reasons you mentioned insurance, taxes etc. They make same sex couples go through so many @**!@* loop-holes that straight couples can NOT even imagine having to deal with. So as far as telling or explaining just give a quick general sentence (I like Raye’s comment above regarding this). You and Remi know why you are doing what you are doing when you are doing it and that is what matters. You both know the challenges and difficulties that are SOOOOO wrongly forced on same sex couples when ALL they want to do is marry the one they love!!!!!!!!! Anyhow, I sincerely support your decision 100% completely in whatever way you decide to go and whatever you decide to do.
Opps I forgot that I wanted to add Rexie’s comment “Domestic partnership is NOT marriage. Nope. It’s not. So you wouldn’t BE married, and therefore your wedding wouldn’t be anti-climatic.” I think she brings up an excellent point (as always
– you go girl! lol) Think about it (if this is what you and Remi do choose to do) how much pressure this would take off of you (as you Sasha) mentioned. And then you can relax etc and take time enjoying your wedding. Again, do what works best for the 2 of you. 
OK I like the way you all are thinking on this topic … except for the whole, “domestic partnership is not marriage” thing …. *screeeeechhhh* exsqueeze me!!???
If prop 8 isn’t overturned by our wedding date, domestic partnership is all we’ve got and I’ll be taking her name too … so if that’s not marriage, then a wedding day will just be a “commitment ceremony” …. bleh … I’m hyper and ADD and have to clean our closet before Remi gets home.
BIG TYPO- I am NOT as verse on this as Rexie is- I only queoted what she said above.
I went by what Rexie had written. I should have researched it before agreeing/quoeting what she’d said (no disrespect Rexie-like I said you are way more verse on this then me).
Sorry. Please do not worry Sasha. I am sure it is totally fine. I’ll look into it.
Sasha, calm down.
Domestic partnership is marriage for us, for now. I think what Rexie was trying to say was that it won’t take away from your big wedding day. I don’t think she meant it the way you took it, beautiful.
Rexie, am I wrong? Please clarify so Sasha can relax a bit, lol
Dear Jazi, I didn’t mean you sweetie. And I’m not mad at Rexie! I’m just confused and worried about the details.
Like if we don’t use the term “wife” until the wedding day but I take her name when we file the papers? ….. I don’t know, I hate the dissonance that creates in my thought process … like file the papers, but don’t say we’re married … just so we don’t cause people to be less excited … but take her name because if I wait, I’ll have to pay hundreds of $$$ for a legal name change after the fact instead of the $33 filing charge with the d.p papers. …. So I’d have her last name, but not the title of Mrs. yet??? ….. UGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!! …. did I mention I haven’t slept much lately and I can’t concentrate!!!!!
No worries
Sasha You know Rexie and I TOTALLY have your back. 
It is unbelievable all the bull shit that same sex couples have to go through!!!!!!!! J.Lamply hit it on the head that Rexie just supportively meant it won’t take away from your big day- and that is all I supportively meant too by agreeing with her. Go for it- we support you 100% in your decision to file the domestic paperwork. Do not second guess yourself or your decision- it makes complete sense. Hugs!
Didn’t mean to cause such a stir. I apologize Sasha for being clumsy and seemingly insensitive. J. Lampley had it right, though. I only meant that filing for domestic partnership now would not detract from your big day. I have high hopes and fair faith that marriage will be made legal for same sex couples before your wedding day. Thanks, Jazmenha for your confidence in me. Raye’s response was clear and level-headed and I’ll get behind what she said 100%. As far as taking Remi’s name, and what you’ll refer to eachother as goes…just do what feels right for you in your heart and don’t be concerned about what others think. This is about you two and no one else.
ok Sash… listen. Relax and sleep on it. IMO you should go ahead and do the legal stuff on paper to satisfy government documents. Because really, do you go around calling yourself Mrs. Remi Sasha’s wifey? Sign documents with your new name. Answer legal questions with your legal name but allow yourself the icing on the cake of not publicly announcing your new name until the “I pronounce you..” part. It is almost like being pregnant but not finding out the baby’s sex until it is born. Some people want to save something special for the big day. I consider domestic partnerships for gays a little like being pregnant.. we don’t have the baby yet but we know it’s coming soon.
Sasha, I think what Rexie was saying is that the term “domestic partnership” (at the point you GO and simply submit the paperwork!) does mean you really are married, and at which point you reap all of the benefits NOW that come with it but, that you can THINK of it in a (mental sort-a-way) that you and Remi are not really married (but you really/legally would be/are) until your actual marriage ceremony is done. Bascially, u take advantage now by doing the paperwork and in your mind (in order to keep your pre-wedding bliss) just think of it as not being complete until the actual ceremony takes place. I hope this doesn’t sound too confusing!!
Personally, I think it’s a good idea. You wouldn’t have to tell anyone if you did, and you’ll still have all the fun of planning your dream wedding. But that’s just my opinion…
Sasha I did some research for you regarding your concerns- let me know if you want the links- your plan sounds wonderful. Go for it. It’ll take some pressure off you to plan your wedding in your time and still have all the positive benefits of the domestic partnership. From the research I did (in an attempt to rest your understandable fears) it looks like a great plan you have so please rest your worries and enjoy this special time in your lives. This is about what you and Remi want and what is best for the 2 of you.
Enjoy!
Sasha – Indeed, domestic partnership is all we have in CA for now, and it’s a hell of a good deal when you look at what folks like Lucky have been through in Ohio. But the lack of fanfare, the lack of the word marriage itself, the lack of all of the federal rights, being seen as less than a “real” marriage by many straights…these are all the reasons our community is fighting so hard for full marriage equality.
Think of the ability to register as one perk we have above straights – indeed, it’s much like getting your marriage license ahead of the wedding, but ours comes with rights and protections (for once!). In CA, employers, hospitals, EVERYONE must convey the exact same rights to registered couples that they do to married couples.
As for when you exchange rings, when you start calling her your wife, etc…that is totally up to you. I didn’t mean to completely take away from what registering means to the couple involved – it’s a huge step and a huge commitment. To the state, it’s just a piece of paper, but an important one. No less important than a marriage license.
As far as names go – we had a big wake up call when we realized you don’t get the “change your name clause” in domestic partnership that you get in legal marriage. When you get married in this state, you have the right to change your name in the process for free, with no additional hassle. When you register as partners, you have to do what everyone else does for a name change – pay $500 (or more?), file an application, publish it in the newspaper, go through a waiting period, and then head to the courthouse to have a judge approve it. Total pain.
All of this bullshit is why registration is not equality…that and the 1100+ federal rights and social validation that come with legal marriage.
For what it’s worth, we looked at registration as the best we could do to protect ourselves and our relationship, and we looked at our wedding ceremony as the celebration of our commitment to each for life. And a marriage license will just be icing on the cake when that comes. Whether or not Prop 8 is overturned by your wedding day, it will be amazing and special. It really doesn’t matter when you start saying wife, when you wear rings, when you change your name, etc. Your wedding day will be the party you throw to celebrate your lifelong love and commitment to each other – whether it’s a few months or a few years after you register.
If you want to tell people you’ve registered, and you want to wear your wedding rings, call Remi your wife, etc. now, go for it! Registration is all the state gives us for the moment, so embrace it. And tell your family and friends exactly what you’re doing and why – getting yourselves protected and legal, and waiting until you have the planning and the budget to have the wedding of your dreams. Anyone who cares about you will totally get it.
And perhaps hearing your personal struggle with this will open a few eyes in your family and elsewhere as to how much we have left to do for full equality.
Whatever you do…please don’t let this make you start the insomnia spiral, the racing thoughts, etc. Nothing is worth your personal peace and well being. You and Remi need to decide what feels right to you, do it, and then be loud and proud about it…you have every right to be, you’ve each found the woman of your dreams!!
Sorry that was so f*cking long. This is just very close to my heart…and I know what this kind of turmoil can do to chicks like us!
Natalie, thank you for so much information. And everyone else too, sorry if I don’t name everyone … I seriously haven’t slept in a while …. but I wanted to address one point. Natalie, can I ask when you guys became partners? Because as far as the name change goes, at first we couldn’t do it, then we could …. then some dumb ass changed the law and we COULDN’T again. But “in # Assembly Bill 102 of 2007 (Ma) allows parties to a registered domestic partnership to legally change their name to include the last name of their partner.”
I’ve been looking at the current, most recent domestic partnership papers and they allow for you to change your name now! And we have 2 friends that are married and one of them took her wives name, here in CA.
So I want to hurry up and do it before it changes again since they can’t seem to make up their mind.
Oh, I also talked to a lawyer friend and she said, “currently, as in today you can take her name, hyphenate both last names, form a new name from both last names or change your middle and last name to anything on either one of your birth certificates.”
So, I’m STOKED about that!!!!
See Sasha Everything WILL work out just fine for you and your love. That is such a wonderful blessing for you to have the wisdom of Natalie for you to lean on as she has been there and been through all you are going through regarding this. She is like your “wedding mentor”
– I love it! 
@ Homie – See, everything’s fine…Rest now, *SMILE*
Ah! Then go for the name change!!
We registered in 2006, so this wasn’t an option for us. And my wife was 7 months pregnant when it became legal to marry – we decided to wait rather than rush with everything else going on. Then Prop 8 passed when no one thought it would, so we lost our chance for a marriage license for now…don’t even get me started about how much that pisses me off!
I know this is making you crazy, it would make me crazy too. But you have to find a way to center and get grounded again…sleep is the most crucial piece, so if it’s already off, please do everything you can to get it back on track (meditation, yoga, etc.). I struggle with this exact sort of thing on a *very* regular basis. Even as we become stronger and more stable, big events, big emotions, etc. can throw us for a curve. We have about a thousand times more stuff going through our heads than your average person, and it’s a lot to handle (my therapist loves to say bipolar thought processes are like a fire hose to most people…and he also says we’re brilliant and amazingly strong considering how much we can handle).
Just be mindful of what actually matters here. This is about you and Remi and your happiness. Period. Decide what makes the two of you happy going forward and then go for it. Don’t feel like you need to keep secrets…that would be painful and feed this self-perpetuating cycle that has an enormous negative effect on you and your emotional state. Not worth it.
Register now. Take her name now. Call her your wife now. And plan the shit out of your dream wedding for next year or two. All of this will keep things on one plane for you and avoid the nastiness of cognitive dissonance…which is way unsafe for us. And tell people what you’re doing and why – you’re taking the first step toward your wedding, by formalizing and protecting what you have right now. And icing on the cake – you’re taking advantage of the name change before they get crazy about it again!
Deep breaths. Above all else, get some sleep and take care of yourself.
I’ve been reading some of your older bipolar posts and now seeing that you’re not sleeping, and Natalie’s comments made me start thinking. What big change or event may happened in your life recently? Well, I don’t know you personally but I feel like I do through your blog and I may be stepping out of line, but it would seem to me that whole being stabbed in the back by one of your friends and writers may be a trigger event?
I know I know, you won’t name her, but we all know who it was. I can’t imagine that having to deal with that level of bullshit didn’t affect someone like you in a deeper way then you’re letting on. Maybe you don’t even realize that was a trigger? I’m not just talking out of my ass either. My sister is bipolar. My twin sister so it’s the closest thing a non-bipolar person can get to the disease and I know the type of things that could set her off. It could be anything like a breakup with a boyfriend, a school dance, college finals, a family vacation, a fight between us. Anything that was upsetting or even exciting in a good way could sometimes trigger either a depression or a mania.
I don’t think I’m way off here, but that sort of betrayal and public confrontation, never mind whatever behind the scenes crap you probably had to deal with. But shit like that is not good for you.
If you’re anything like my sister, you may be oblivious to your own triggers. Ask Remi when she noticed your shifting moods. Ask her if she thinks it coincided with the whole back stabbing event, even within a few days.
Not trying to be all up in your beeswax, just a concerned reader. We all love you Sasha and want you to be happy.
So I’m with Nat, go be Mrs. Sasha Remi and then plan your dream wedding with all of us right along for the ride.
Holy shit this was long. Sorry people.
Hi Lampley, thanks for the concern but I don’t think that whole mess had anything to do with it. I’m fine. Just ….. I’m fine.
Really.
Sasha, listen – don’t worry about us readers/commenters on CCL or that(in your mind) we will be left out of any wedding ideas etc… these things you must do for you and Remi’s peace of mind and YOUR life. We all understand what you need to do NOW! Do it! Stop thinking about CCL and start thinking about yoou’s guys…ok? Shit!
Hi Sasha!
I’m a newbie that came across your blog last night and am hooked! Congrats to you and Remy. So on to the subject at hand when it came down to sibgning dp papers vs waitin on prop 8 my wife and I did the domestic partnership route in 2007 on morning over coffee with the thought that when the day came that we had either a commitment ceremony or got legally married that it’d be just as special since it’d be another chapter in our love story. We were legally married a year and a half later on halloween 2008 at city hall with my dad, our close friend and daughter as witnesses and jus as we knew it would be the day wasn’t any less special then if we hadn’t already been dps or that we tossed all wedding planning out the window and did the nice simple city hall route, dress and all.
I hope my rambling is Helpful!
Ps excuse any errors I’m trying my hand at postig from my nookcolor